videogame things you think about a lot lot lot

i stopped my replay of oracle of seasons when i got to the dungeons and saw the larger rooms that were essentially layouts that would have worked on a single screen

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After making Neopets: The Darkest Faeiry. Idol Minds made this for the PS3

image

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glad to see them continuing a theme

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apparently, pain was the all-time most downloaded psn game as of january 2009. making it a candidate for the just-invented-by-me “james cameron’s avatar award” for works that were allegedly successful, but no-one remembers or cares about them even slightly

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I learned about it while reading the wikipedia page of Andy Dick and his many many many crimes, he’s a playable character in Pain for some unknown fucking reason

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My friend downloaded Pain and we played that sucker for at least 12 hours straight.

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There was no getting away from Pain and its copious DLC in weekly browsing of the PS3’s PSN store back then = o

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theres discorse on the “I want shorter games with worse graphics” ideology thanks to someone making a thread of "these are games that are examples of ‘shorter games with worse graphics’ " and they chose Slay The Spire and Potionomics, both games where the teams crunched super hard for months, and also games which are hyper popular.

My own feelings on this, having made a “shorter game with worse graphics” will be ignored because the numbers on my end aren’t great. The lack of numbers means that making a new game is much harder, and the fact that they’re relegated to side project work also means that making them is much harder. When I started my new project file 2 days ago I was hit with a huge wave of trepidation: do I want to start this journey again?

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“The fear of blood tends to create fear for the flesh.”

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they’re right that Slay the Spire is ugly as sin at least

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Yeah not exactly a stunner. Helluva game tho

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pretty sure there was a download code for pain with the ps3 i got back then

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it just feels like a social media sentiment/statement of intent about what a person likes that doesn’t translate to anything material about the game space. it’s too broad and stupid of a meme to have any real material use and it’s easy to redefine “shorter games with worse graphics” as basically anything that’s not a tentpole AAA release. it’s easy to say you hate current mechanisms in culture and politics at large but there’s no real sense that they can be changed so it just comes down to a statement about your consumer identity.

it feels the same way you’d see huge swaths of journalists and critics talk about how “important” niche indie games were to cover but eventually all stop covering stuff entirely because media companies failed and they couldn’t maintain steady readership. and now stuff that’s only ten years old is disappearing from the consciousness completely and stuff that used to exist is being redefined out of the space. you hear big youtubers and stuff doing that now too (i.e. talking about how “important” it is to support “the indie game development community”)… once again, it doesn’t mean anything most of the time. unless they’re covering something that already has a chance to be clouty and successful - and then they can congratulate themselves for being morally good by supporting “the indie community” when it’s just them covering stuff like Slay the Spire or whatever.

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shorter games with worse graphics meme is the sort of thing that makes sense until you actually try and break it down yea, one thing that bugs me about it is it usually isn’t actually used to mean like time convenient aesthetics and seems retrofitted to a certain set of tastes more than anything else, like the meticulousness of getting perfect shadows and animation and emotional eye sheen etc is just moved to meticulous historical replication and fine tuning the Jank to be perfectly disaffected. in a lot of ways the Real ‘worse graphics’ would probably look more realistic (high quality asset packs are easier to acquire and less time costly than bespoke low poly stuff for example)

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one thing to remember about the meme is it originated from moshboy, who is one of the few people who actually does tons of research into no-budget indies. for many developers he may be the only “marketing” they will ever get.

i’m not sure what discourse swirls around it, i haven’t really seen anything on that thank god. seems like the phrase somehow escaped the limited context it was meant to be taken in: sincere appreciation of what snobs might call “outsider” or “trivial art”, and a desire for anyone who makes art to make a living doing it.

as for web publishing, as one of the OG indie games coverage people from back in the day of TIGjam, yeah it’s just impossible to get paid for it. only reason i was able to was bc my boss was hogging all the “easy” stories so i had to diversify to make money as a freelancer lol. in the end i developed an appreciation for the oddball and made a lot of lifelong friendships, but it was deeply impoverishing materially. i was very far below the poverty line for a long time.

would be a dream to support a website like that but i think whoever runs it would need to basically be okay with being an arts patron since (as someone who has run a middlingly-popular website, 300k uniques and 3m+ views per month in its heyday) it’s unfeasible to make a living doing. maybe if you founded your own ad network that caters exclusively to indie developers idk.

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05_ryu_beat_ken

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longer games with even worse graphics

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moshboy has done a lot of great stuff and raised awarenes of a ton of games that would otherwise go completely overlooked or uncommented on (and, disclosure, moshboy has included my games in collections and promoted a handful of them over the years). i really respect moshboy’s work and fervent dedication to being a voice shouting from the rooftops about stuff very few people care to hear about.

moshboy was also responsible for coining the term “trashgames” to refer to the games he highlights, including products of glorious trainwrecks, various somewhat clunky ludum dare entries, intentionally frustrating or ugly ten-minute experiences, garish but beautifully crafted masterpieces by thecatamites, projects uploaded to itch by mostly anonymous people with no followers, etc, etc, etc. he went so hard on this branding that IGN even bothered to cover it in 2017:

Cook, who goes by moshboy online, has dedicated his time over the years to curating “trashgames,” an effort he describes to me as “wandering through old abandoned ruins, looking for things that other people somehow missed.” His use of the term “trashgame” is one of endearment — an unconditional acceptance of a side of gaming the mainstream neglects and discards. To me, it also feels like a bold reclamation — trash is messy, cheap, hard to classify, and sometimes unpleasant, but are those always inherently bad things?

“I’m a big David Lynch fan,” Cook explains. “I enjoy getting lost in things and contemplating what the **** I just played. I like to be truly unsettled. It’s one of the strongest emotions that media can evoke from me.”

i hated that turn to “trashgame,” to be honest, as a person who’s associated with, cares about, and knows a few people in those scenes. i didn’t like that one of the if not the most visible advocates for small, personal games that existed outside of even the mainstream “indie” scene, had decided that ‘trash’ was the moniker to sell them (or fail to sell them) to the world with. i get that it’s endearingly used, but i don’t like these games being called “trash.” that works for a specific punk-rock-aesthetic-uber-alles zine-brained all type of person who already hinges their identity on such associations.

‘shorter games with worse graphics,’ like all slogans, effectively means roughly nothing of substance and is most often used as a contrarian assertion of identity (postured vis-a-vis “the industry”) and also as something of a blunt, balnd cudgel. beyond moshboy’s own feed, it’s clear that as it’s taken on an independent life where no one agrees on what it means either, which is part of why it means nothing. i’ve seen people who see it as advocacy for better labor conditions in the AAA industry, or as advocacy for throwing away your consoles and rallying in the streets making “trashgames” (which advoacting for making more isn’t necessary—there are 68 million of them already—and actually playing them would be the thing that isn’t being done that maybe arguably should be done), saying Switch is superior to PS5, ‘haunted PS1’ itch-dot-io frontpage supremacy, or asking your favorite streamer to play more Celeste.

it’s catchy, so we can keep saying it. but why. i’m not sure what conversation it’s a part of. i don’t know where it gets us. i don’t know who’s trying to advocate what values to whom to what end. i’m tired.

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reading stuff like this makes me wonder how i can make myself better known. i’ve written about plenty of indie games no-one else has, and i’m at least respectful of them, even when i don’t like them.

i guess my version of the “worse graphics” slogan is my honest belief that dlsite is better (or at least more interesting) than steam

(i mean it is defintely better, in that it’s just a website and you download your purchases as .zip files instead of being some weird obfuscation layer like steam is, but i’m referring above to the libraries and how easy it is to find new games i’m interested in playing)

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i’m thinking about a friend who said their games used to be covered by people like Chris Priestman throughout the 2010’s and eventually at some point it just stopped. the current mechanisms of online media didn’t support this kind of writing whatsoever and eventually some of the really committed people just finally burned out. i think a lot of people on the creative side unfortunately don’t really understand that it was just a handful of extremely committed people propping this stuff up in the first place, and that those people have limited energy and resources. i wish there was a lot more mutual communication there between the people who talk about games and the people who make them certainly and a lot less of just wishing and expectation. i fell out with one game developer friend over the pandemic by basically asserting that people who write for Kotaku are human beings with their own motivations and conditions. also there was a sense from a writing side that you were like, obligated to be a blandly positive ‘advocate’ for the space as a whole to counteract the gawking youtuber fan mobs or something, which i think helped no one. because now the youtuber fan mobs are the only ones most of the niche games people are trying to lobby to get noticed by now anyway.

that also might have been why there was so much effort to brand this kind of work in new and different ways, to try and create some momentum behind it. stuff like Offworld or the Arcade Review were really committed to it before running out of steam. before “trashgames” it was “altgames” or “rentpunk” or whatever also. but there’s just too much different stuff with wildly varying intentions and audiences to really fit under one category. in some ways the space for non AAA games is kind of like the top 15% or so vs. everyone else. and like there’s utility to aesthetics people think of as “trashy” ofc but it also has real potential to reduce the really interesting and unique levels of artistry a lot of the best stuff in the 85% or so operates at that are often not reflected in higher visibility games at all. a lot of people have different perspectives and visions that are just not at all compatible with each other’s.

but anyway i do believe there is and will continue to be a growing niche for more stripped down, unconventional and highly personal games and there’s potential there for more media covering that stuff in the future in an intelligent and engaged way. we’re just not yet to the point where enough people who see the value of that stuff are connected to each other for it to coalesce into a coherent “thing” - it’s all in various discords and subcommunities right now. right now it feels like everything sort of speaks its own language of whatever micro community it’s part of and is not remotely aware of its connection to other things. a lot of it is under the umbrella of stuff like “PS1 horror” or whatever like you said. people are increasingly unaware of the worlds and discussions that are happening outside of them. but i think some of those people will eventually grow tired of that and start to branch out. and hopefully they’ll carry their audiences with them. it might not always look like people want it to look like, but i think the interest is there.

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