god, i'm so sorry (superhero-comicbook nonsense)

Roxane Gay is a notable person, who actually does have some experience in comics, and is basically as huge of a 180 from joss whedon as you can imagine wrt basically anything

but i actually don’t think this tweet exchange will lead to anything, it feels more like dc trying to steal a bit of Black Panther’s thunder in an extremely minor way

My work won’t let me open that site cause it has “gay” in the url. \m/

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Cool I guess I’ve seen it now?

The first and only time I saw Deadpool it was projected above a pool on board a terrible cruise ship for their Adult Movie Night or whatever and I ate some really crappy pizza and drank a pina colada. I figure that’s about right.

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One of the John Wick guys is doing this one so that’s an upgrade?

He managed to make Atomic Blonde mediocre though so uh

what a beautiful Dad story

it’s like a perfect dew drop, a world contained

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You people have no idea

ok… time for some game theory

spoilers below, as I’m pretty sure I’ve cracked this thing wide open

the Russo brothers don’t want people to know what IW is about, and they specifically say that they don’t want people to know the film’s “true plot”,

not just like whether or not Iron Man kicks the bucket, but the plot itself

this implies that the plot is something different from what is suggested in the trailers, namely, a bunch of cgi spandex men running at each other in a forest (huge conceptual step up from a bunch of cgi spandex men running at each other at an airport, btw)

so what could this mean?

what… could this imply?

well. Take a step back. Consider that the MCU’s greatest successes have come from blending the basic plot structure from a popular filmic subgenre with their precious IPs

Ant Man is a heist movie, The Winter Soldier is a political conspiracy thriller, Spider Man: Homecoming is a teen movie, Guardians of the Galaxy is a saturday morning cartoon, etc.

So: Combine everything we know together:

  1. The movie will have an insanely large cast. A star studded cast, if you will.

  2. The movie prominently features a major MacGuffin, an object everyone wants their hands on–the infinity stones

  3. Marvel movies often borrow their basic plot outline from more popular genres

When you look at it like this. It’s almost obvious. The basic plot of Infinity War will be…

lifted straight from such cinematic classics as It’s a Mad Mad Mad Mad World Cannonball Run and Rat Race.

That’s right.

The characters will be thrust into the challenge of their lifetimes, when the wacky madcap duo of The Grandmaster and The Collector descend to Earth to challenge Its Mightiest Heroes to a competition. A race, if you will, for the Infinity stones, secretly stored away in an unidentified Greyhound bus stop locker just outside Las Vegas, NM. To the victor… go the spoils.

But wait, what’s this? As Iron Man, Thor and the gang are busy prepping their souped up, tricked out rides for an epic chase across the desert…

A new challenger arrives from outerspace. It’s Thanos, casino magnate and playboy king, who wants the stones for himself.

He’ll use every trick up his sleeve to make sure he gets to those stones first.

I think the evidence is clearly pointing in this direction. Stay tuned for announcements of possible cameos by Jackie Chan, Rowan Atkinson, Breckin Meyer, and Burt Reynolds

Edit: I said Las Vegas New Mexico and I meant what I said. You don’t know my struggle.

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The world isn’t good enough to hope for this

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The little girl from Ant-Man puts on sunglasses and says, “I’m Mrs. Hitler.”

It ends with a Smash Mouth concert.

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Superhero Comics Are Good Again, Everybody

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Holy shit what

Following that Prophet revival.

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they also did GLORY too, and Alan Moore a few years ago took over Rob Liefelds superman expy for him Supreme for awhile too. strangely enough.

glory was really good.

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I made the mistake of reading the awful comments on an awful io9 article about marvel movie/tv crossovers. There was a bunch of dudes in the comments completely devoted to the idea that there must be a scene in Infinity Guantlet 1 or whatever where Spidey runs across the Netflix Heroes for Hire fighting generic aliens or pulling people out of rubble or something, and Power Man gets to tell him “We’ve got this.” Multiple dudes spelled out this exact same scene in separate threads. Sometimes Spidey makes fun of Daredevil or being blind, but otherwise it’s identical.

Why are nerds so invested in seeing something with zero drama or character development play out? Why do cats care so damn much about brand synergy?

And more broadly why’s there this weird nerd drive that the pinnacle of whatever myriad forms of media that they’re obsessed with be that they’re turned into a massive live action Hollywood movie?

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On top of that, don’t these kids know that there’s a Thanos/Death/Deadpool love triangle they could be moaning about not making it to the screen. Is that Joe Kelly series not cool anymore?

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I guess Kelly’s Deadpool run is too old for the young’uns, and some of us old fogeys might be soured on the fact that he was the one who really started pushing things in the direction of random reference humor and such, though not nearly as bad as what would later come and balanced with some good character moments. Also T-Ray sucked.

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