(hopefully none of you are taking my opinions personally, I’m funnin’ around
THOUGH ALL OF THIS IS WHAT I ACTUALLY THINK)
What about Our Lord Cosmic Spacehead, who descended from the Heavens to take some happy snaps so He could impress some randos
NOT A PLATFORMER
adventure games with action scenes are just lying to themselves and everyone else
2 Likes
you haven’t yet answered the important question tho
SNES or Genesis Aladdin?
that is not relevant to my current train of insanity but Jesus Christ, SNES
regardless of what I think about the production values of Virgin’s game or the relative ease of Capcom’s effort, that SNES version plays smooth like silk made out of a baby’s skin
8 Likes
Literally no contest, SNES version 100%
5 Likes
I finished the second game off my “ten games to try and play in 2019” list, that game being God of War. The recent one where he has the beard, not the older one where he has less of a beard.
It was pretty snazzy! The combat is really solid for much of its duration and as someone who started with the Colecovision it is hard to avoid being wowed by the absurd production level of the thing.
A few assorted thoughts, some spoilers so don’t read if you care about that:
-The way they handle the lake area is really good. Using the Metroid II gating of “can’t access further areas until the lava/water pulls back” is a good one and I like how it affected the various tiny islands and coastal areas. What you thought was the island was just the tips sticking out at the very top and I thought they did a good job recontextualizing these areas once more of them was unveiled.
-The whole Atreus turn towards evil/just kidding takeback was bafflingly ill-executed. He basically becomes a jerk with zero build up, and reverts to form in record time, to the degree that I wonder if something was cut at a late point. The game does that a bit with some minor story bits (it’s an odd game where i think the macro story mostly works while a lot of micro moments just arise and are discarded almost instantly) that makes me wonder if the commitment to the “single take” bit just kinda borked the pacing.
-The blades of chaos were rather poorly balanced and kinda take the combat down a peg as soon as they become a permanent option. If they weren’t gonna be a one-off and couldn’t have been better balanced they should have been saved for a late game mechanical twist.
-I loved fighting the valkyries and they felt like a real “hey, you got some Souls in my stylish action game” moment. I think the game really could have used a few more bosses but these were a fine alternative and the final one really pressed me into re-evaluating my tactics.
-As someone who could not deal with God Hand it was good to have a better camera and markedly better radar system. It is always better when one can battle the enemies instead of the game itself…
*runs away
2 Likes
dang, I haven’t played like three of these. Seems goo–
…
wait a minute
where is Chelnov 
at least Toki made it in somewhere 
i mean, yeah, this is news?
RUN AND GUN, NOT A PLATFORMER
LIKE, “RUNNER” IS LITERALLY IN THE TITLE AND ONE OF THE POWER-UP ICONS IS A GUN
QED
IT IS A TWIST ON THE GENRE YOU CRETIN AUTO-SCROLLING DOESN’T DISQUALIFY IT
HAVE YOU EVEN LOOKED AT STAGE 3 LATELY THE MIDDLE OF THAT SHIT IS PRACTICALLY DOODLE JUMP
look
every goddamn FPS in the late 90s had jumping sections and puzzles
that doesn’t magically make them platformers
except for Quake. Quake is a platformer.
1 Like
Right
just like how every car game in the 2000s had upgrades and stats
but that doesn’t make them RPGs
exceptions to the rules! Chelnov is a platformer.
1 Like
thought exercise, let’s replace some words
just like how Chelnov has sections of platforming
but that doesn’t make it a platformer
RUN AND GUN
NEXT YOU’RE GONNA TELL ME DASHIN’ DESPERADOES ISN’T A RACING GAME
IT IS CLEARLY A MANIC ACTION SLAPSTICK VERSUS GAUNTLET, DO NOT OVERSIMPLIFY IT
1 Like
CAPCOM/KONAMI RULES
IT ONLY COUNTS AS THE GENRE IF THE RIDICULOUS PHRASE IS ON THE BOXART
DAH-HAH
HOISTED BY THINE OWN PETARD
CLEARLY MARKED AS AN ACTION GAME
A CATCH-ALL TERM USED AT THE TIME OF RELEASE
ONE THAT INCLUDES
PLATFORMERS
1 Like
yes and one of its meanings is platformer
1 Like
What tier is Dynamite Headdy?
I’m split between saying “All Treasure games are god tier (not you Light Crusader)” and “Japanese or export version?”