Bottom Line Reviews

Sweet Home is the Yume Koujou: Doki Doki Panic of survival horror.

1 Like

Getting Over It with Bennett Foddy is QWOP’s successor, Mother 3.

Getting Over It with Bennett Foddy is the anti-Skyward Sword.

2 Likes

?!

5 Likes

7 Likes

Planetoid Pioneers is “Getting Over SOMA”

Omg

1 Like

80s overdrive is a beautiful-looking game that needs more friction and less numbers

Street Fighter V is Arksys’ victory over Capcom.

DragonBall FighterZ is Arksys rubbing salt into the wound.

1 Like

Super Stardust Ultra is a pretty good net yaroze game

2 Likes

Castlevania: Symphony of the Night is ”when a band releases their seventh album and it’s a double LP song cycle containing allegorical references to their own career. Also they hired an orchestra”

8 Likes

The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild is… the act of picking up a discarded branch after a rainstorm and stirring up the musty leaves, moss, and water that have collected in a hole in a stump.

7 Likes

Crackdown is cookie clicker in the shape of gta3
Crackdown is, or could be, cop morrowind

6 Likes

Bloodborne is…

stepping in dog shit on the way to a networking event at a sculptor’s convention.

4 Likes

but… the dog shit is haunted

6 Likes

Factorio is the tremendously sad feeling of realizing that eating all of those donuts is going to clog up your arteries in your old age and there’s nothing you can do about it now

5 Likes

Final Fantasy XII is fully automated luxury final fantasy

6 Likes

Final Fantasy XII is what made me want to learn AppleScript.

4 Likes

the last guardian is climbing a rickety ladder to your aunt’s attic room as a child while your cat scrambles past the other way

I love this game so much

8 Likes

Musou games are the video game equivalent of listening to a sad song when you’re sad

6 Likes

Ys VIII: Lacrimosa of Dana is "spring break in JRPG form."

Curse (MD) is "the vidcon equivalent of being tone-deaf, but still getting up on stage and singing your heart out."

Yakuza 6: The Song of Life is "knowing when to hold 'em and knowing when to fold 'em."

The House in Fata Morgana is "aggressive, unrelenting empathy."

The Witcher Enhanced Edition is "working days as a facilitator, working nights as a janitor, and all with a car that barely runs."

Panzer Dragoon Saga is "opening the door to the world of your dreams glimpsed only through windows, smiling, and then quietly closing it."

7 Likes