@jsnlv, as SB’s resident Homestuck/Undertale fan, your gooey poke-innards most resemble slurpuff, the adorable idiot cupcake of pokewhatever.
Though you seems harmless enough at first, your opponents will likely be slow to realize that within your fluffy center beats the heart of a ruthless JRPG tactician. The cute monsters are always the scariest. Duh.
Your pure Fairy typing is extremely defensive, with immunity to the threatening Dragon type and weaknesses only to Steel and Poison. While your stats are mediocre across the board, it’s your studied, omnivorous movepool that allows you to rise to become more powerful than your enemies could ever imagine.
jsnlxndriv (Slurpuff) @ Chesto Berry
Ability: Unburden
Shiny: Yes
EVs: 248 HP / 180 SpD / 80 Spe
Calm Nature
- Cotton Guard
- Calm Mind
- Dazzling Gleam
- Rest
Out of the box, you’ll want to use Cotton Guard, a fairly rare move that multiplies your Defense stat by 2.5, turning your mediocre 86 base Defense to the equivalent of 215–incredibly high even for the Uber tier. From there, you’ll use Calm Mind to season. Calm Mind raises your Special Attack and Special Defense by 1.5. After one or two usages you’re pretty powerful. But with three, you’re essentially unstoppable. Now, with two-to-four turns of set-up you’ll have taken some damage, even with your defensive boosts. And you might have picked up some status effects along the way as well.
If you need a quick heal, simply use Rest, a move that puts you to sleep for two turns but fully heals your HP and cures all status ailments. Usually, two turns of inactivity would be a huge issue, but that’s why you’ve packed a Chesto Berry. You’ll down that sucker and immediately wake from your slumber, good as new.
But that’s not all! With your ability Unburden, using up your item will double your Speed, making you faster than any pokemon in the game, not wearing a Choice Scarf (which multiplies Speed by 1.5).
So, to review, by your fourth turn, your Defense is boosted by 2.5, your Speed, Special Defense and Special Attack are doubled. You’ve basically become one of the most powerful pokemon in the game with one of the best typings. Now it’s time to unleash Dazzling Gleam, your Fairy STAB move, now powerful enough to OHKO most opponents.
Now, I make it sound good, of course, but there are some potential hiccups in this plan.
Impressive as your stats might be, you’re ultimately still somewhat vulnerable to a powerful Steel or Poison types. A crobat could be a problem for you, but in the OU, you’re more likely to be taken down by a scizor or excadrill or any of the many powerful steel ‘mon out there. Worse yet, mega-scizor can use you to set up its own Swords Dance Attack doubling, and it will likely take two more ‘mon to bring that thing down, if it doesn’t just sweep your whole team.
Though perhaps your biggest worry is enemies with Taunt (locks you to attack moves for three turns), Encore (locks you to the last move you used until you switch out), and Roar-type moves (switch you for a random ally). These are the general perils of a set-up ‘mon. And with such a long set-up, you’re particularly vulnerable. And, of course, after you use your Chesto Berry the first time, Rest will truly incapacitate you for two turns, during which time your enemy could simply poison you or paralyze you again or bring in a Steel or Poison type to wear you down.
It’s important to note that once you’ve used your Chesto Berry, it’s really best not to switch you out again. So, overall, we most likely want to put you on a team with a fire ‘mon like u_u or a Steel trap like drobe. nocode can actually threaten Steel with his Ground moves as well, but only Fire can threaten scizor.
But hey, if we find we need to use you in a more quick and dirty way, we can always do a Belly Drum set.

Belly Drum cuts your HP in half but maxes out your Attack, literally multiplying it by 3. It works best with a priority move, but we can give you Lum Berry, which will replenish ¼ of the HP you lose after drumming. Once you’ve eaten this berry, you’ll have your double Speed. Wish replenishes 50% of your HP on the next turn, which allows you to Cotton Guard, take some damage, Wish, take a little more damage, Belly Drum, Lum Berry, and then get your Wish-heal to almost full health. With no way to heal status effects, and a an only moderately high Special Defense stat, this build gives you a shorter time limit, but it also turns you into an effective sweeper a lot faster.
jsnlxndriv (alt) (Slurpuff) @ Sitrus Berry
Ability: Unburden
EVs: 248 HP / 16 Atk / 244 SpD
Careful Nature
- Cotton Guard
- Belly Drum
- Play Rough
- Wish
Of course, no pokemon is an alway-effective, full-team sweeper. It’s the nature of the game that everything has checks and no ‘mon is safe to just sit there. Still, in general, once a player gets in a free set-up, there’s little an opponent can do to throw a wrench in your plans. And even if you prove to be vincible, you’ll certainly take quite a few of your antagonists down with you. Not bad, for an idiot cupcake.