[h4ck3d_464in] Watch the weightwatchers in Watch_dogz® 2 (Ep.2)

[SONNICK]

Last time on Yu-gi-oh blackhat hackers Deus-Ex-Reboots™ Watch_dogz #1:

• Some dude h4cked a rocking-horse …
• … test drove a Ferrari F40
• … h4cked the hell™
• … crashed a party
• … h4cked TEH CITY
• … and took revenge on poor d00d/party-animal/sociable computer geek DEFALT.

But!

#!

And here we thought our good ol’ h4cking days were over!
Time to go back and get our h4rdcore h4cking co4t, San Fran needs …
#you!

OK! Now that I donned my h4cking co4t, I am SO ready to go and expl_#$%&-
0xF000-B442 0xF22$-%EEE !<xbl$& ;qrt2K=x0x0+r~061 0x#FFFF-FFFF

C:\system\override> DEDSEC.exe

[km]

@SONNICK

As evidenced by the fact that I post on selectbutton, I hate games

Anyway, when does this come out, and do I get to punch venture capitalists in the face?

[ronk]

at some point over the next month or two, i might redbox this game, only to dick around in a recreation of the Embarcadero in SF and to see what Ubisoft’s idea of Oakland is

[ronk]

i guess women aren’t that hard to animate after all

Ubisoft says it will remove Watch Dogs 2’s ‘particularly explicit’ genitalia

[Mr_Mechanical]

Man I was looking forward to a big budget game with casual nudity like that. I read about it last night and was like, huh that’s neat, maybe it’ll be like when San Andreas came out and every character just casually swore fuck this and fuck that and then after that games just had the f word in them as a matter of course. Ubi really dropping the ball here if you ask me, way to not be a trailblazer like that other company they’ve been trying to emulate the past ten years.

[ronk]

something tells me they didn’t put the same effort into male genetalia…

[Mr_Mechanical]

NSFW: Watch Dogs 2 features fully uncensored penises and vaginas, hurray...

Naked People Are Appearing All Over Watch Dogs 2

[Mr_Mechanical]

So apparently they’re just patching out the female nudity of that particular npc. No more crotch-less panties it seems. That’s even worse, actually.

[Felix]

this is… interesting. I have no idea why ubisoft took it upon themselves to finally put anatomically correct models in a videogame, and now they’re patching them out.

[Mr_Mechanical]

It’s actually because of Sony. According to a thread on neogaf someone was playing an early copy of the PS4 version, discovered the nudity then made a video clip and shared it using the PS4’s share function. Then Sony suspended this person’s account (and later banned them for a month) for violating their terms of service which prohibit using the share features to send lewd material or whatever. Now Ubisoft is responding in their own way.

So the whole situation is actually multiple levels of stupid compounded together.

[eska]

i feel like neither wobble physics or fluid dynamics are at a point where we’re ready for ppl’s junk in game though y’know

though i guess it’s prob not too hard to just slap a rag doll on that wang

[Father.Torque]

TES modders have been doing it for centuries.

[Felix]

that’s what makes ubisoft’s pioneering work on crotchless panties even weirder

[diplo]

It’d be impressive if they managed to make the protag(s?) in this as unpalatable as the first game’s

[SONNICK]

@km

Anyway, when does this come out, and do I get to punch venture capitalists in the face?

it already is out, actually. Well, at least in yuropistan, so it should be out around the world as well.

@Felix

that’s what makes ubisoft’s pioneering work on crotchless panties even weirder

word! though I obviously have … different goals when playing games, it seems.
Haven’t seen nudes jumping 'round so far, don’t feel like I should. Am I missing out on sth?

Kinda not!
I really like the way this game approaches this whole thing from the get-go, w/ a login screen after booting,

so that stuff is obviously aimed at n3rd5 who like their stuff nerdy, so … job well done, I guess?

… kinda not.
Because the game starts out almost too-well-done, or rather it doesn’t show the rough edges that made part #1 so lovable.
It pretty much picks up where #1 left off, immediately establishes that ctOS 2.0

is bad™,

you infiltrate the blume HQ,

sneak around a bit,

install a backdoor (even w/ scrolling sourcecode, that’s cute) and you’re done,

credits could roll.

…… kinda not, of course.

If you sit through that _rocky_ start, you are treated to a real piece of art:

that is quickly followed up with some snarky social commentary wrapped into a gaming experience™, best enjoyed with your favourite flavor of doritos®. Somehow ended up at google nudle

while driving 'round SF bay.
Game wants you to be a cool hacker? Then grab that smartphone and selfie the shit outta this:
gangsta-style,

h4cker-style,

gangnam homie-in-da-hood-style:

Now we’re talking!

(oops sorry 4 da broken link ~~~)

[SONNICK]

p.s.:
Did you know that there are three kinds of aces?

those who seek strength,
those who live for pride,
and those who can read the tide of battle.

And him? He was a pr0h4xx0r they called solo wing pixy Retr0.

Do I feel retro?
Not yet!

[tibyz]

just how wide in the san francisco bay area does the game’s map encompasses? i know it has stanford and oakland and alcatraz, but was looking if they made the whole thing and put cities like san antonio, santa clara and sausalito in there as well.

i watched a video and seeing landmarks i was familiar with from being there a while ago made me awfully nostalgic, to the point i might endure the hideous plot/general motif/humour/ubisoft-ness just so i can walk around those places again.

[SONNICK]

just took two screencaps of the map, here you go:

[tibyz]

i see… thanks!

[SONNICK]

[quote=“SONNICK, post:17, topic:3262, full:true”]Do I feel retro?
Not yet!
[/quote]
Kinda retr0 to start this post with a “last time on [x]” intro, so I’m not gonna do that today and cut straight to the chase - literally.


My fav story up till today in the game:
I have been driving around southern 'bay area and ended up in stanford, and when you’re there already, gotta checkout the campus, right? So i take a walk, hunt down some l00t, enjoy the atmo, and suddenly see a very familiar shape on the road …

isn’t that …

yes, it is the google nudle car!

And such is the AI that it even is vain enough to go off and take selfies of itself immediately ~~~

j/k OK, but it sure looks like the only thing you could call it is: “innocenti”.

So, i obviously had to steal that egg, and since only a bratty student was loitering around in the area, I took the chance ~~~ needless to say, that prick immediately called the police, and off i went in my (electric, of course, them nudle hipsters~~~) new ride, and headed straight for the hills, because you can usually lose the cops there. Thing is, it just wouldn’t go up far the hill. Too heavy or not enough SPEEED, so I was skirting along an invisible arc while police was catching up, and then I got stuck in some “Silicon Valley” writing/installation on a hill. However - cops couldn’t see me there, so I kept silent/remained stuck and lo and behold, off they went ~~~

and off I went on a tour around SF.

(just look at that obliterated bench, remember that such is the doing of the feisty nudle car ~~~ )


and the best bit about it?
Nothing of this has been planned or designed/scripted, no experience points, achievements or whatsoever have been involved here. Just a batch of dots/coincidences that came together to create a story that I’ll remember when thinking back to Wdogz2. And that’s so far one of the coolest things of this game.