this is why i bounced off the witcher 1 after a couple hours, i had assumed it was improved by 3
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Iâve had two friends wax poeticly about-no THREE friends- about Ape Escape 3 being a âdude that game!â Game.
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So did I but then my Geralt kept bumping into furniture during his first visit to a tavern and I was like no thanks I do this enough in real life
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lainer was talking about playing the witcher 3 in voice chat before shadowdark and the first thing I said was âmoving around in that game is like trying to run away in a nightmareâ you just are so sludgey
when i thought REALLY HARD about what I like about the game
- geralds tight pants
- dead baby gps quest
- the design of the crones
last time I ever played a game cuz it was âimportant to the conversationâ no it fucking isnât. itâs ten pulp fiction references and a dead baby joke
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a big memory of the early parts of the witcher 3 for me was falling off seemingly tiny ledges and taking a ton of fall damage, like spelunker or something.
i did like the look and feel of the big city in the north, thatâs the most positive memory i have of the game.
the overwhelming memory i have of it is constantly thinking âthis must be the last part right?â, and it never was. eventually i just stopped playing. gameâs too fucking long
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my main memories of Witcher 3 are similar. itâs way too easy to just fuck stuff up by accident. and the combat is truly horrendous. I followed @daphaknee 's advice about turning down the difficulty and that did make it better, but yeah, I feel like the game makes me feel neurotic in a way I donât like.
Red Dead Redemption II felt similar
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I emailed gog support to tell them that the achieivement support in the tomb raider reboot games doesnt really work properly and they were like âOK. We will just unlock those achievements on your accountâ which is a really funny response to me but I mean hey itâs probably way easier than fixing whateverâs wrong with the fucked up versions of these games Crystal Dynamics gave them
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omg is this the first time youâve changed your sig
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i think it might be on sb2! i had a servbot sig for a while on sb1, iâm pretty sure.
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I thought Witcher 3 was great and loved all 300 hours of it or whatever it was and I enjoy the way it expects you to learn its weird combat and movement system. Itâs like if FF15 had a writer who was better but also an edgelord
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Thatâs good to know. Iâll have to play it eventually because itâs Final Fantasy but Iâve kept putting it off because it looks so much like Final Fantasy: for men. How bad is it on that front? Is there something for us girls?
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I mean if youâre the kind of girl that likes hot sad boys suffering constantly than thereâs a lot a lot of that.
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Speaking Final Fantasy XVI
The vibe of this now that Iâm about 15 hours into it is that: This is a Final Fantasy XIV expansion that:
- Can kill characters for real
- You canât play a giant beefy cat woman
- There will, presumably, be an actual ending
- They can say fuck and have pg-13 in the 90s sex scenes sometimes
- Has a lot of 80s anime sad boys going through horrible things
- Itâs simultaneously Gundam, Ultraman, and Godzilla sometimes
- Has issues with writing women (Wait, I was clarifiying how it was different than FFXIVâŚ)
- Uses an action based combat system thatâs like light devil may cry but in actual practice feels more like a tails game that has actual kinetics most of the time
- MAJOR SPOILER: I was not expecting to blow up this worldâs version of a Mako reactor
Exactly like FFXIV:
- Confusing politics that range from good to lib brained in a single sentence
- Has a cast of lovable hot boys I adore which is good because it forgets about women existing a lot
- Has elaborate science fantasy worldbuilding thatâs way more thought out than it seemed like it would be at the start of the game
- There are a lot of crystals
- Despite every criticism I can make of it I am glued to the plot and deeply compelled, especially as it gets more and more off the wall and insane
So as usual this far, my review is: Itâs a fucking Final Fantasy game, they all got issues, they all got good parts
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As a Final Fantasy XV apologist, sounds great!
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For what itâs worth, my girlfriend made me 100% it. Though, a few years later we were both like, âwhy did we do that.â
Iâm greatly enjoying Tigressâs XVIposting though. I thought the game started very strong but declined pretty hard by the end. The side quests are implemented in a way thatâll really make you want to do them, but theyâre mostly not worth the time.
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Like everyone else in history I got bored with State of Emergency because the objectives suck. It is a tiny tech demo hiding as a game and was Full Price at release. Which, lol. Grand Theft Auto bought a lot of good will. Nevermind this is by the team that made Earthworm Jim 3D and that Tom And Jerry Power Stone clone?
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See, it IS a true Final Fantasy game!
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yeah the game doesnât really stick the landing imo, but I enjoyed âplaying itâ
that said, I cannot remember anything about it, now. like names of characters or anything. I remember the visuals, though
Silent Hill f - this game seems really good so far, but iâm going to make some complaints anyway. the first boss fight of the game, why have a character tell me âcome through the window!â right as iâm about to fight? because even though my instinct initially was, âthis is a boss fight,â I then started looking for this window that doesnât exist. on top of that, they expect that you would investigate a well and start turning the crank with absolutely no indication to do so? now, in some ways, that feels nostalgic of a PS2 game or whatever - not giving me much direction, or giving me weird, confusing advice.
but then, whenever my pipe is about to break, the girl will not shut the fuck up about it. âwow, I better get a new pipe soon.â âthis pipe is going to break soonâ etc. etc.
choose a path game - either assume iâm completely incapable of playing a video game, or treat me like you hate me and give me nothing
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recent stuff
re7 end of zoe - it really doesnât do much for me. super linear. expects you to be invested in the very basic punch stuff. turns out like most first person games it still feels like hitting air cause you canât judge distances in 2d. built on some kinda joke about âbadasseryâ or something which is definitely for someone else. should try the escape room dlc soon instead
ace attorney dual destinies - i really hope spirit of justice makes this all worth it. not exactly bad, but it is annoying and long.
tactics ogre - fan translation of the original version. very pretty tiles. slow in ways that could risk killing my momentum with it. im not sure what path im moving towards but i assume ill end up doing terrible things
lamulana 2 - endgame has some dangerous deep dives without warping, trying to find something important then struggle to an exit. good game that is very mean
the dark spire - impossible to look at in the modern style, why is it an off center viewpoint like that? the wireframes on the other hand are maybe a bit too spartan to keep me going after 5 hours of crawling. ridiculously close to wizardry system wise, but also kind of mimicking the sense of humor which is uncommon enough to be surprising. i respect it. wont play more of it.
butterfly ĂŚffect - unsurprisingly i like this vn about a wannabe harem anime protag getting sexually snuffed by women who hate him. its funny how its all him trying to insert himself between pairs of messed up girls who are very possessive of each other
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OG tactics ogre is great but itâs best to think of the entire first chapter as a tutorial that happens to lack tutorial text â the game isnât as hard as it appears but it keeps offering you several options of which about half seem viable but actually arenât and will result in you banging your head into a wall. you have to be super willing to take its feedback about what deals damage and doesnât get you killed, then youâll have fun.
like most Matsuno games I honestly wish theyâd made it harder to grind so people donât assume they have to
oh and equip weight makes a huge difference in the mid game
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