time for lots of stream of conscious reviews!!
Commander Keen: Marooned on Mars
SHORT VERSION: Still a banger today! Master the power of the pogo as you journey through the enemy and obstacle filled monuments of Mars.
LONG VERSION: Id’s first big hit, the team were very open about how much they were influenced by Mario, and like the Super Mario Bros. games, this is all about mastering the momentum and physics of your character as you make your way through a series of obstacle and enemy filled levels.
A standout feature was the pogo stick which lets you jump higher at the cost of mobility. You also have a gun!
The game does a lot with little, with the levels still managing to feel varied and interesting. Having said that, some levels can feel a bit simplistic in their design, and I’m hoping the next two episodes can make the most of the mechanics with the level design… but I wouldn’t call any of them bad!
The world also has a sense of place and mystery. There are lots of optional levels, many being odd temple style areas with minimal enemies, and statues of the green aliens that communicate with you. Remnants of a previous civilization? The castle in the final level suggested that to me, too. I also love that the levels on the caps are ice ones, very clever and adds a sense of place.
What I found most interesting is that it’s entirely possible to just skip getting the pogo, and the rest of the game can be beat without it (aside from the final level, which also has a pogo to collect). All the other installments have you start with it. It feels like maybe they designed levels without the pogo in the game first, and then added it later along with areas/shortcuts only accessible with it?
A result of this is that many levels have multiple ways to approach situations (and optional areas with bonuses), and feel rather open-ended which I appreciated. The pacing of levels is still managed with keys or the design itself, foreshadowing Wolf and Doom’s design.
A lot of levels give you ways to avoid combat, which is useful because ammo is largely limited until you find stockpiles. The final boss can’t even be beat with traditional combat, but is a simple puzzle like the Quake ones. Oh, finding the secret level is a fun little puzzle, too.
Unlike most other Apogee platformers, it has a lives system which feels a bit dated but it at least gives you a reason to collect bonus items, and extra lives are awarded pretty liberally.
There is also a good combination of enemies. Some are just nuisance ones that push you around, others will shoot but not kill on contact, some WILL kill on contact, and some will both kill on contact and shoot.
The action is viewed from quite away from Keen, giving you a good look of your surroundings which I appreciated, and it’s all silky smooth… especially for a DOS game.
But yeah! This is still a great time today. Perhaps too primitive for some people, but I reckon it holds up really well and remains one of the best DOS platformers.
EXTRA TIDBIT: I made a homage to the final level in Mario Maker, and Tom Hall (designer of the level) played it and liked it! That was a cool moment.
EXTRA EXTRA TIDBIT: One of the more valuable bonus items is a Kant book, which I found very funny.
Commander Keen 2: The Earth Explodes
SHORT VERSION: Slightly tighter than the previous game, Keen’s second adventure lacks the atmosphere of the first, but that doesn’t mean it sucks! It has more creative level design as he hops around an alien ship, trying to disable its lazers aimed at Earth.
LONG VERSION:
Keen’s secound outing takes place entirely on a Vorticon ship, and as such there isn’t as much mystery as the first game. It does have a nice sense of place, though… each of the levels have icons indicating a function. So you might hop around a reactor, or some kind of living quarters.
One of the living quarters had an interesting design… you could go straight to the right and exit the level, but you can see lots of powerups underneath you… as well as a tonne of enemies, so it was a bit of a risky move trying to get them.
It also feels more like a mission this time, as the ship is aiming lasers straight at major Earth cities, so you gotta find all the generators around the ship and destory them. Hilariously, you can flip a switch and fire the cannons yourself, making an instant game over. At least you can pick your target… each generator has an image next to it showing which city is targeting. One level shows the Sydney Opera House for example.
This time around Keen starts with his pogo stick, and you won’t get far without using it. It’s also more focused on combat this time around and is more generous with ammo, though generators are often heavily guarded by strong enemies and you’re best finding a path that avoids confrontation.
The baby Vorticons are very annoying but luckily they don’t show up too much. I should also note this game is harder than the previous one, but it never got too bad until the very last few levels which were a bit rough! Was satisfying beating them, though.
Since we’re no longer on Mars, there are no more Martian enemies… it’s all Vorticons and robots, quite a few of them being new to this game. An important one is a non-violent one that can walk on walls. You can ride it to access other areas, and though sometimes it’s for secrets, later in the game you have to use them to complete levels. You can actually soft lock some levels if you kill them… I think they should have been made invincable, but also it’s easy to just not shoot them.
Level design feels tighter than the first game, with a better sense of flow and more creative design. I did feel like there were more blind jumps, but they weren’t too frequent.
Some other tidbits…
There is friendly fire, so you can get some enemies to shoot each other
There is a hologram that gives you a VERY important hint (it involves the light switches)
There are still optional levels
All the collectables are different in this one (and again different in the third game)… it’s a nice bit of extra effort.
* The lighting doesn’t feel as atmospheric as the first game
So yeah, a more challenging but overall slightly better game than the first… I think they’re pretty equal, to be honest. Another banger from Id!
A Short Hike
SHORT VERSION: Animal Crossing with less capitalism! A light and breezy adventure with a great sense of movement as you climb a peak, though the side-quests are mostly busy work.
LONG VERSION: One of those cozy games I’m so averse to, but I enjoyed the open-world nature of this one, plus the feeling of movement is really great! Hopping, gliding, climbing, slowly getting closer and closer to the peak, and figuring out how to reach chests… it was a good time.
Lots of fun, quirky characters too, though most of the side-quests are all dull fetch quests and (short) collect-a-thons. Wish more were based around movement. The scalper is a dick too, I don’t care that he can’t pay his tuition.
But yeah, overall this is a lovely way to spend a few hours!
Commander Keen 3: Keen Must Die
SHORT VERSION: The Saturday morning cartoon aesthetic hides a much more difficult Keen game, and one with less interesting level design. It’s still okay, but I’m not as… KEEN on it as the previous two.
LONG VERSION:
Taking place on the Vorticon’s home planet, Keen’s third adventure has the vibe of a Saturday morning cartoon with bright blue skies, green trees, and buildings full of beds, toilets, and colourful decor. Also, ninjas are here.
Lots of levels consist of buildings to look like homes (very human homes, at that), with families running around that you mercilessly slaughter, especially the annoying younglings.
The BIG downside to all this is that most of the levels consist of boxy towers with boxy rooms that don’t make very interesting levels, and even worse battle areas. There are also far too many tiny, cramped areas that just aren’t suited to Keen’s physics. The other main design type are caverns/sewers underneath buildings which also aren’t very interesting.
Id did try to make levels feel unique, but they are all just too restricted by trying to mimic buildings. The best ones are places that feel like bases or such, but Secret Agent did it much better later.
It’s also much more difficult than the other two keens, with way more enemies. It’s certainly doable, but a few levels did frustrate me quite a bit.
The final boss is fun, and riding the Nessie to the secret level that takes to a school to learn the Galactic Alphabet (allowing you to translate words in all the other Keen games) is cool, but yeah, this really is the low point of the first trilogy. It’s still okay, but far from great.
Also, there is a part of the world map that totally looks like a penis.
Keen Dreams
SHORT VERSION: A spin-off game between the two trilogies, this one ditches the pogo and gun, and has Keen fighting killer vegetables in a dream world. Short and sweet… well mostly sweet.
LONG VERSION:
It’s interesting going back to this after playing the trilogy of games that followed it. They have much more vibrant colours (this one is very muted), add ledge grabbing (which isn’t missed too much here since the levels aren’t built around it), Keen gets his pogo back (again, is not really missed here), Keen can look up and down (something that WOULD improve this one), and Keen gets his gun back.
Instead of the ol’ lazer, Keen throws… uh… I’m actually not even sure what they are, seeds maybe? I had fun with these because they are thrown in an arc so I could attack people over ledges and what not. Quite handy! Enemies are stunned instead of killed, which is fine, I guess.
There aren’t many levels in this one, but they do a good job of making them feel varied. Oh, and some have bombs you need to find which are used against the final boss. Thankfully, the game tells you which levels have them. It might be possible to softlock yourself if you don’t find enough? But you only need uuhh… 12, I think it was.
Aside from the lack of looking up and down, the only other major gripe with this one is that HORRIBLE enemy that throws tiny… french fries? at you. Instantly kills you, they can throw them from off screen, and they fly at you FAST. I had so many deaths to these guys. This would be so much better without them.
Also, Keen walks too slowly on the world map.
But yeah, short and mostly sweet. Oh, and I also like how all the collectables are candy, since all the enemies are vegetables. Come on, Keen, you gotta eat your greens if you’re going to beat Mortimer!
Stray
SHORT VERSION: MEOW-diocre! I sure wish they STRAYed more from the formula! Well, this game was fun enough, actually. But once you get past the environment design and the novelty of playing as a cat, it’s a pretty standard action adventure that fortunately doesn’t overSTRAY its welcome.
LONG VERSION:
This was a very different game to what I was expecting… I thought it would be a silent adventure where you explore this world just as a cat trying to get home, but it turns into some Pixar-ass movie with robots you talk to and do quests for.
Judging it as the game it actually is, it’s fine! The environments look great, but don’t have a sense of place… they feel like very pretty video game spaces.
Gameplay varies a bit, there are linear action/stealth puzzly bits that mostly fine at best, but the core of the game are hub areas where you talk to robots and do little fetch quests and stuff for them. Feel a bit like towns in Zelda games… or even like the hub areas of the more modern Deus Ex games.
The most fun is figuring out how to get from A to B as a cat… the platforming is very simple, but it works well. It’s also fun talking to all the quirky robot characters, as Pixar as they feel. Too many quests are of the fetch variety, but they often lead to more figuring out how to get from A to B, so I didn’t mind too much.
I found it VERY HARD to suspend my belief that the cat we played as was so smart and well-behaved. As a cat owner, let me tell you that it’s very hard to get them to do anything for you let alone solve puzzles. If it was a cybernetic cat or something it would have been much more believable.
There are parts where you do very cat stuff which I enjoyed, but if you want an actual cat simulator, I would recommend Catlateral Damage.
The story has some interesting angles and mystery despite being rather simple, so yeah, I had a fun enough time with this but ultimately it’s pretty forgettable.
Commander Keen 4: Secret of the Oracle
SHORT VERSION: I’m not KEEN on this sequel! While it looks and sounds vastly better than the original, it’s full of cheap deaths and annoying enemies.
LONG VERSION:
Well this certainly looks better than the original trilogy, with big detailed sprites and much more colour. Sound is also better, too! And super smooth scrolling. But man, I hated playing this.
Part of the problem are those big new sprites… you see less of the screen now, and I would often jump straight into an enemy, even with the ability to look up and down. Also, lots of surprise death pits.
Another problem are the enemies, especially those mosquito things! Tiny, invincible, and they move around fast AND randomly, I had so many deaths to those little fuckers. Other enemies can be annoying too, but those were by far the worst.
Levels are also quite long, and it was very frustrating to die near the end of one since there are no checkpoints and you have one-hit deaths.
Levels also have too much going back-and-forth to the different ends. They at least did a good job of making different areas feel unique… the pyramids all feel like getting through a trap filled dungeon, the mirage place with the disappearing platforms was a fun gimmick, and of course there is the well of wishes with the dopefish, a neat swimming level even if it’s a bit trial and error.
Controlling Keen isn’t as fun this time either, with the pogo being much weaker and most levels taking place in very tight places with little room for movement. Being able to mantle was nice, though in the original you’d just be able to jump up there without having to grab anything.
Putting the “fire” button on a separate button was a good move. Having a wind up for the fire, on the other hand, was a very bad move.
Finding the path to the secret level is really clever! Too bad the secret level is INSANELY DIFFICULT and not in a fun way. Especially since the difficulty can drastically change depending on when you get the dart guns to start shooting (it helps to get them in a pattern you can easily navigate).
Overall, this was just a step backwards in almost every way. It has lots of fun enemy designs, the messages when you rescue the sage dudes are fun, and it has a decent sense of place… but I found it just a chore to play.
I had both this and the original Keen as a kid, and spent way more time with the original. I now realise why.
Commander Keen 5: The Armageddon Machine
SHORT VERSION: Marginally better than the previous one when it comes to the amount of tedium, but lacks a sense of adventure, and most levels tend to feel samey.
LONG VERSION: Well, this game got rid of the most annoying enemy from the last one, and overall feels a bit better balanced, but it still shares plenty of the annoyances (most coming from the camera being so close… enemies have a tendency to shoot from just off-screen). So, it can still be tedious, but it’s not AS tedious.
It also lacks the sense of place and adventure the previous game had… though there are lots of different (colourful) backgrounds and sprites, the entire game takes place in a ship and the levels kinda feel the same. There are definitely memorable and clever moments that standout, but overall it all feels rather homogenised.
This time you have to get to four areas to break some fuses on machines (which is very satisfying since you smash through them with your pogo) in order to get access to and destroy ANOTHER machine. Once again, the final challenge is a little puzzle.
This really feels like a spiritual successor to the original trilogy’s episode 2, but without the sense of place.
But yeah, still not as good as the old games, still annoying at times, but less so than the previous one.
NOTE: I’ve been playing these all on “normal” difficulty. Maybe I should try easy instead…
Amnesia: The Dark Descent
SHORT VERSION: The Dark Descent is still dark… decent! Though dated and wonky in a number of ways, it still has a lot of unique, memorable moments, an intriguing (if tropey) story, and a great atmosphere.
LONG VERSION:
Another indie classic, this time one that’s largely responsible for the modern horror game! I remember enjoying this a lot back in the day, though more so the first half than the second. And it turns out I feel the same way years later!
The story is HEAVILY influenced by Lovecraft, and features many well-worn tropes (though they DO try to be creative with some), but there was enough going on to keep my interest and wanting to learn more about the horrors happening in the castle.
There are some big holes… one of the endings didn’t make much sense to me for example, and the gullibility of your character is so ridiculous and is no excuse to avoid accountability imo. Also, he’s a dumbass colonialist. Can’t go into it more without spoilers! But overall, it was an interesting tale of supernatural beings, horrific crimes, and inter-dimensional mischief.
Anyway, as for the game itself, it’s mostly running around a giant castle in first-person, finding clues about what the dilly has happened, hiding/running from the occasional monster, and solving puzzles which keep impeding your progress towards the inner sanctum.
Everything before you go down the elevator is pretty fantastic, with simple but satisfying enough puzzles, incredible atmosphere, some good scares, some fun horror stealth, and a great sense of dread and mystery as the Shadow slowly consumes the area.
The bit with the invisible monsters is still a top horror game moment for me. It’s in the demo if you just want to experience that!
It takes a bit of a dive after the elevator gameplay wise, but before I get to that, I’ll talk about problems I had with the overall game.
First of all, the physics stuff when opening doors and drawers was neat back in the day, but it’s just a bit of a hassle and immersion breaker these days, especially since you’ll be searching about 50 identical looking desks.
Having tinder all over the place also makes everything feel very gamey, though it does feel stressful (in a fun way) when you’re running low on oil and light and you start to lose sanity. I don’t think losing sanity does anything except make your vision worse, but it was still stressful! I’m also grateful for the game providing enough oil and tinder so that it never becomes a major problem running out… just a possibility if you’re not careful.
Anyway, the second half still has some great atmosphere, environment design, and an interesting story, but the puzzles start to become more obtuse and tedious, with lots of running back and forth to accomplish things, like it’s there for padding. There are also platform bits here and there which are wonky, and the confrontations with enemies become predictable and rote pretty quickly. Also, the guy you meet in the dungeon is a real mood killer.
But considering its age, the small team, and the small budget, this as aged pretty well and it’s still worth a play if you’re into horror games. Don’t expect it to match the best horror games of today, but I’d say it’s better than the mediocre ones.
EXTRA TIDBIT: this game has WAY more dicks than I remember.
Commander Keen: Aliens ate my Babysitter!
SHORT VERSION: A return to form! Though it still has some of the same problems as the previous games, it feels better built around the new engine, and also has a fun Looney Tunes aesthetic.
LONG VERSION:
Despite being made between the previous two episodes, I feel this is the best to play by far. It still has some of the problems… namely putting high risk areas RIGHT at the end of long levels, and the close camera preventing you from seeing things before it’s too late.
BUT hazards feel more thoughtfully placed, and there aren’t hugely annoying enemies this time.
I also love the aesthetic, which feels heavily influence by the Marvin the Martian Looney Tunes shorts. Lots of variety in the environments too, and different levels feel like different places with different purposes (despite mostly just being obstacle courses). There is a VERY light adventure element, in that there are levels where you have to find objects to use on the map. Every other level (that isn’t in the way) is optional.
Oh, one more complaint… there is way more switch hitting in this one than the other games. The switches look cool, at least.
But yeah, still not as good as the original games, but a fun and colourful end to the original series. And the cliffhanger was resolved in that GBC game I’ll probably never play!
