dark archie timeline


appreciating sheriff keller’s increasingly cavalier “if you weird teens wanna fight crime go for it who cares” attitude


same and also that the reason betty won’t tell him anything has now finally been settled on as social embarrassment? remember the episode of seinfeld where george hunts a serial killer by himself after making an awkward faux-pas with the police


the cheryl blossom lipstick is Lime Crime’s red velvet matte and thats what i got paid ro write about today


anybody else noticing that the menace level of the serpents is just “whatever”

they supposedly only sell weed except whatever penny’s doing?

there’s like no conflict about fp quitting or alice coming back or archie, the guy who called the cops, performing?

its amazing


Can I read it or do you feel weird about SB/Day Job crossover


happy with both the communist veronica and weirdly brutal jughead arcs this episode. when he made that heavy joke about a “pound of flesh” afterwards i was sure it would come up again but i guess not?? did he carry home a chunk of human skin or didn’t he. the end of the black hood thing was perfunctory but had its moments. you know its a good show when archie being BURIED ALIVE is only the third thing you remember from a weekly ep. but i’m sure they won’t let things rest there even if it means going the necessarily more awkward route of having, uh, two serial killers.

mvp was cheryl’s cherry decal sweater, which turned out to have a pattern of MULTIPLE big cherries later in the ep.

see you all after the hiatus…:guitar2::guitar2::guitar2:


y’all with betty’s santa claus dream i think they’re up to 5 (?) dream sequences of being shot/stabbed/brutally murdered

what a weird thing to have as a…running gag

also just a general appreciation that they keep the terrible parody names from the comics like american excess and spiffany’s but have to say them with a straight face


I think this is my favourite part about the show. It fairly accurately mimics my level of memory retention while engaging with it, which consists of me getting reminded of everything during the “Previously on Riverdale” section and half-dropping everything omitted into my shady memory swamp. I love how the black hood arc wrap up almost works off this where even the protagonists forgot that they solved the mystery an episode ago and just sorta moved forwards shark-like and beautiful.

January can’t come sooner ya’ll!!!


Gregg Araki is doing a wrestling episode.



i;m still in love with this show


keeping up with this thread is almost better than watching riverdale


i’m still watching this!!! enjoying the slightly lower stakes of s2 second half. standout moments to me so far were the appearance of a character called poppa poutine (for whom if i remember correctly hiram ordered the poutine? rookie mistake…) and the bit where jughead realises tall boy stole the head because a witness described the guy in passing as “tall”. the only biker over 5’3.

enjoyed the lake house episode where it was like they suddenly realised there are probably actual horny teens watching this, somewhere, and wanted to get all that stuff out of the way. but even the hot springs episode has a sudden tonal shift sequence where masked figures threaten to brain archie with a bat! love it!! can’t ignore the core fans.

excited for more blossom family drama after the last ep had cheryl not only faint but also be revived with an ornate bottle of smelling salts.

not really into the cooper family stuff as much although i do keep forgetting that uh they killed someone and then left the body in the woods? feels less narratively important than it might? also archie was right there when that guy get shot near the lake house! high incidental body count.


Just heard “Dickensian”, “Byzantine” & “Lovecraftian” within a span of maybe 90 seconds tops



This show is batshit and I love it. Still surprised they’ve only just barely toyed with Archie x Betty





[alucard voice] i’m interested in this


is this whole season gonna be a 1980s dungeons and dragons satanic panic cause those FLOATING BABIES were next level