Xanathar's Guide to Cleavin' a Goblin Clean in Twain (feat. D&D)

a videogame where you play as a dm and have to solve your players personal issues and emotional hangups to keep the game running smoothly


I’ve seen write ups like this before and I’ve always felt that its perhaps too reductive about categorizing people and psychoanalyzing your players rather than just… talking things out

1 Like

Yeah, true. I will say that I like how the solution they present for each of these “problem situations” is to talk it out with the player.

1 Like

yeah the actual advice listed is good, but it still depends on this very old school categorization.

It’s weird to list this all as ‘problem players’ too because each description opens up with “this isn’t a problem unless”

as much as I make fun of the prevailing trend toward “we took a genre and made it a visual novel about mental health” this would actually be extremely good

generally decent person Ewen Cluney made a tabletop rpg around this concept


I’m glad you said this because I was about to say the exact same thing except I would’ve had to qualify it with “I’m not a DM and have dramatically little ttrpg experience, but…”

I hadn’t listened to those episodes yet so I’m going through them in reverse now and there’s lots of little things

For instance: near I can tell, we were just supposed to get the accurate map in exchange for introducing Fatgris

you’re right! It’s a good thing the azure company is very drunk right now or else I would have just given you a map

But then didn’t we (by which I mean, I think, I, trying to salvage BJ’s fumblings) promise to travel with him as a sort of “look we’re in this together we’re not just brokering you off to some randos, dude!”?

Yeah that is my vague memory of how it went

We were instrumentally trying to keep Fatgris happy because he could lead us to the Vale of Crypts and the Eye of Zalmoxxis and those sounded like things we would probably be interested in dealing with

Okay I’m joining yet another campaign, this time in the Genesys system (which I’m told is derived from an older Star Wars tabletop system). It’ll be in modern-day, and will probably involve us jumping dimensions. We are mercenaries, that’s all we have to design around.

I’m getting pretty decent at an Entrapta voice, so I’m going to make my character a nerdy scientist/programmer/biologist type. Thinking of naming her “Dr. Linda Hyde”.

THE TWIST is that she has a rare degenerative bone disease that will for sure be the end of her, causing her to lose the use of her legs and all that. But, in searching for a cure, she came upon a yeerk-like brain slug that, once bonded with its host, gives a slew of abilities, among them healing enough to keep the disease at bay.

The parasite, which I’ve decided will look like a Skrill from Earth: Final Conflict, sits at the base of the neck, under her long hair. I’m thinking of calling it “Illim”, and having it be a Las Plagas-style ancient being that’s jumped from host to host throughout history, usually dominating them and taking complete control. With Hyde, she is willing sharing a body with it, so it doesn’t need to fight against its host for a body.

DM is letting me detach the brain slug from Hyde and attach to minion-level characters to take them over. I just have to pass a check to dominate the mind.

Two things I’m still trying to figure out:

  1. What abilities she’ll have. I guess she’ll be primarily there to hack computers, do medical stuff, and use her historical knowledge from the parasite.

  2. What she’ll look like. Kinda wanted something akin to civilian-clothes Doc Ock from Spiderverse. Also considering Darlene Alderson from Mr. Robot, but, she seems too confident for the shaky, Entrapta-like persona.


It’s hard to even put myself in the mindset of creating a modern-day character. I’m D&D poisoned

Ever since I was a teenager though I’ve had an enduring desire to make and play a ttrpg character that could justify the use of this art:


1 Like

I’m remembering a character we did for a League of Extraordinary Gentlemen game based on 20s-40s American culture. I had FDR who had retreated from public life at the end of WWII to run the coming espionage engines of the cold war

and built himself hydraulic legs

since this was GURPs I just put all my points into a kick ability (and patrician-ness), including an ‘energy’ requirement. So he still rode around in his wheelchair, but once he stood up, you knew a fight was serious


someone just linked this insane larp proposal in a facebook group for everyone’s amusement, and now i am posting it here



isn’t this just richard garriott’s house


this is just a cult

1 Like

Pretty sweet way to get some free servants

i finally got a copy of ryuutama, and it’s one of the nicest-looking books i’ve seen! the game seems really interesting, too. i might even try to play it at some point :open_mouth: