I got my hands on a pristine GP32 Blu (that stands for backlit somehow) a while ago and kindly asked how to homebrew and Rudie gave ideas but I didn’t even have a USB cable and it all seemed a bit overwhelming so I just got another one.
It’s non-blue but it is homebrewed which makes it very ideal for me, because now I can play all the games.
And I did, literally. Except for “Story of Bug Eyed Monster”, which I couldn’t find. And the famous daughter raising sim Princess Maker 2, which has an English DOS version.
Here are my impressions:
Astonishia Story R
- looks astonishing, but it’s a JRPG and in Korean
- maybe the best game on the system but it’s available in English on PSP
Blue Angelo
- ultra rare Spanish bootleg anime metroidvania that is as much of a slog to sit through as a season of Dragonball Z
- think there was a failed kickstarter for a PC remake, maybe that would’ve been better
- I call this torturevania
Dooly Soccer 2002
- cartoony soccer game that doesn’t look or play as terrible as some of the other stuff on the system
- I played this for a couple minutes and didn’t immediately hate it
Dungeon & Garder - Dragon Gore
- okay looking belt scroller with some light stat building and item collecting, plays a bit stiff and as monotonous as the backgrounds look
- don’t remember any dragons or gore but just played the first level
- probably one of the best games on GP32
Dyhard - With Infinite Stairs
- says it all in the title, I played this endless platformer and died, hard
- having to charge your jump makes this super finicky when you slip off a too short platform and I just don’t have the skillz
- has some adorably cheap looking anime style intro story that makes me want to see more and try harder
Funny Soccer 2002
- super simplified kinda like air hockey with two pucks, but has like a career mode?
- I would love this if it would look and play a bit better
GP Fight
- Korean bootleg Nekketsu Kunio-kun arena fighting (how did they not get sued? I guess Kunio licsense is a mess)
- looks great but somehow manages to feel even stiffer and slower to me than the NES games
Hany Party Game
- this came with two games in the zip file, an endless platformer called “Hany Tower Master” and a super simple incredible machine like puzzler called “I dunno” because the title screen was corrupted
- the puzzle game is pretty neat, you have to guide a ball rolling down into a hole by placing ramps and trampolines, looks a bit like Gunpey but with a ball rolling around (it even rolls upwards)
- Hany Tower Master was the biggest surprise, because I adore it
- it’s super simple, Hany jumps all the time so you only steer left and right bouncing off blocks and inbetween blocks and some have timers and you have some limited jetpack ability but basically you just gotta reach a certain height
- best GP32 game??? (in my stupid opinion)
Her Knights - All for the Princess
- Dungeon & Garder but they dropped the equippable items and made the sprites animate like a late Neo Geo title
- most impressive looking GP32 game but difficulty is impressive too, I can get nowhere
Holeman Battle Race 2002
- Mode 7 Mario Kart racing, I mean running game, where your cars, I mean characters, drift!
- too bad it controls like shit, the oversteer was too much for me
Kimchi-Man
- licensed? garbo platformer, looks bad (but funky), plays worse
- for Kimchi connoisseurs only
Little Girl Mill of a Gingko
- GP32 ARPG! fan-translated to English! more like Engrish! infantile jokes and anime references! also plays like ass! more like Ass-RPG! (sorry)
- if anyone knows how to leave the starting village, feel free to tell me
Little Wizard
- adorable looking 2D fighting game with like 7? characters and of course it plays a bit shit too, but it’s till one of the better things to put in a GP32
- I think it was too difficult for me to reach the end and see if there are character specific endings and if they are any good
Oneshot Voca
- is this an app to record your voice? I have no idea, I couldn’t get it to start
Pinball Dreams
- the best (so much better than the sequels) Amiga pinball game gets its best port (plays, looks and sounds perfect as far as I can tell, but that doesn’t mean much, I’m stupid)
- I love this
Rally Pop
- rough bootleg Worms where the Worms are flip phones?
- can’t even figure out how to jump
Raphael
- GP32 Castlequest (did they get the license for this?)
- this is what I imagine a CDi game to play like
- I like the cute cover art
Story of the Bug Eyed Monster
- didn’t play, probably another VN?
- looks like Mill is in this
Super Plusha
- another one-man show like Blue Angelo but this time it’s more like a cute Amiga mascot platformer
- physics are debatable, I like how your projectile (is it a carrot?) behaves and that you can aim it up and down, but the platforming is awkward (I guess it helps that you kinda slide onto platforms when you touch them from the side)
- levels are a mess and a bit cryptic (you can activate levers that activate platforms and stuff by pressing up) and collecting keys to remove barriers and teleporting around reminds me a lot of playing Bubsy 3 (not 3D, the Jaguar one) but at least it’s not nearly as punishing
- more cryptic design choices: find a shop in the second level to purchase an item that unlocks the option to save and resume your game from the main menu
- easily the best platformer on the system, got released for free at some point
Tales of Windy Land
- colorful and kind of ugly, maybe a worse platformer than Kimchi-Man
Tangle’s Magic Square
- GP32 Puyo Puyo? with weird match rules?
- so slow I turned it off after a minute
Therapy
- GP32 visual novel
- looks alright, seems to mix past and present settings
- need to learn Korean first
Tomak - Save the Earth, Again
- hori shooting game with Metal Slug looking sprites
- plays like a euroshmup (so not that good imo)
- ported from DOS version?
Topy Topy GoGo
- another racing, I mean running, I mean rollerblading game, but it’s top down and it also has drifts, or more like you slide all over, and it’s super sluggish
- took me a while to figure out how to even move because holding down the button does nothing at first and oh boy I do not have the patience
- looks cute though
W.B.W. - Wanna be Wizard!
- another daughter raising sim, you find her in the forest and take her in so she can become wizard
- has some nice real time battle system, like Tales of Phantasia but not as good
- looks real neat and I’d love to play more of this, if it ever gets translated
Wizard Slayer
- another hori shmup but plays even worse than Tomak, also looks bad this time
Woody & Kunta - Treasure Island
- GP32 Mario Party? but it’s two player? and looks bad?
- I stopped after the first mini game (which seemed very random)
Conclusion:
Playing GP32 feels like playing a whole bunch of Chinese bootlegs. All the lovely Engrish and even untranslated Korean in the officially translated releases complete the picture. I wonder how many of these are licensed. Is there a line of Kimchi-Man kimchi? Maybe even cartoons? What about Dooly or Hany, Woody and Kunta? Even if most felt like kusoge to me, I sure appreciated this peek into the curious world of Korean gaming. And I will play some more of the games I enjoyed.
That’s it, maybe I’m gonna check out some more homebrewed stuff next, keep your fingers crossed and ass cheeks clenched my fellow selectbutts.
