columbo is on tubi if u have access to tubi
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Never been a better time
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SPEAKING OF BUG IS ON PLUTO RIGHT NOW
someone said tubi and i always open up pluto when someone says tubi because i cant help comparing and theres no columbo on right now
BUT WHEN I OPENED IT BUG WAS PLAYING
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rewatching a man escaped for the first time in a very long time in preparation for a screening of pickpocket tomorrow, which i also havenât seen in many years. always a bresson girl at heart <3
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i did not know what May December was about going into it. i knew what that phrase referred to, but having seen the cast was just expecting Haynes to be taking another shot at something like CarolâŚ
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Thatâs how we saw it there but itâs not available in Canada apparently!
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I shelled out for the complete Columbo on dvd so I wouldnât be victim to the whims of streaming company rights in Canada.
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Damn I havenât seen one of these in ages, the villains make everyone use their phones now
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air canada keeps the dream alive
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yeah air canada overinvested in those 12 years ago when the economy was really good here so flying anywhere felt really luxe for a long time and now theyâre behind on adding wifi and free texting like all the US airlines have
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Anyway I have literally every other TV show I like in perfect high definition on my NAS but I shelled out for the Japan only complete Columbo Blu ray box set for my wife a few years back so it is the literal only thing I canât just send you a network share link to
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air canada does have free texting now, you just have to have an aeroplan account.
half their fleet is still missing it!!
My most recent how I know Iâm broke moment is realizing I havenât been in an airport since before smart phones came out.
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dtv horror movies i watched in the last while
hell house llc 1-4: (this is a song about a boy voice) this is a set of films about a haunted clown statue. hey who moved this clown statue out into the hall? câmon i know it was one of you guys. this isnât funny. brett weâve had enough of your antics. it wasnât me i swear. looking back over the footage on the cctv: wasnât that clown statue looking in the other directionâŚ? things of that nature. good clean fun. EXCEPT the movies arent really about the charismatic haunted clown bc theyâre being made by like some kind of italian american compound out in pennsylvania, check out these credits (writer/director is stephen cognetti btw)
and so in every movie the real horror turns out to be like, satanic panic stuff, which would be fun if it didnt just mean guys in black hood that made everyone look like Darth Icky. sometimes they get an old guy to come out and do final fantasy speeches so people know heâs an evil wizard. and as the movies progress they get increasingly into the lore of the evil wizard happenings to the extent that the 3rd movie involves a billionaire tech mogul becoming an angel in a car accident so he can fight the wizard by funding a Sleep No More inspired immersive theater version of Faust in the haunted house that like 100 kids disappeared in.
the pick of these imo is the first one, filmed in 2015 but consisting of found footage nominally from 2010 about a group of kids who turn the mansion into their haunted house attraction. and the best thing about it is that they really do all seem like 2010-era horrible coworkers whoâve been pulled into their most entrepeneur-brained friendâs small business idea. like it was this or reissuing the megaman soundtracks on vinyl or making an indie game or something. i donât really care about earnestness in art but i do think these films benefit alot from the moviemakers seeming like they really do think eg a piano softly playing a melancholy recurring theme all by itself is terrifying rather than just an obligatory genre gesture - even when their tastes are corny their handling is never less than efficient and its always a genuine treat when the clown shows up. 2nd and 3rd movies kind of diminishing except for a good part in the 3rd when a girl films herself making out with one of the mannequins in Forbidden Haunted Clown Basement on a dare. part 4 is a comparative return to form in part bc it focuses more on the clown than the wizard and also bc the true crime youtuber heroine is impressively awful. theres a good part where her girlfriend is on a zoom call and it switches to a camera moving behind her and showing someone else in the room etc and all the while her boss is making the most âhmm⌠not great!â expressions on the other side of the call.
deadstream: kind of a letdown in that it was trying for the sort of crazed evil dead 2 / senritsu kaiki crazed people throwing themselves against walls energy but idkâŚi think everything else about a movie has to feel kind of sweaty and crazed for that stuff to really work and the framing premise of this one (âcancelledâ youtuber livestreams from a haunted house he canât leave without losing his one remaining sponsor) was a bit too cute and also the leadâs pwdiepie energy a bit more accurate than youâd want. i like that the ghost gets increasingly frustrated trying to get him to slow down for long enough to engage with her mournful ghost poetry.
slasher.com: this one i stumbled on through one of those youtube channels with names like FreeMovies4U that post full uploads of an extremely random assortment of movies that in this case ranged from old roger corman classics to âamityvilleâ films that seemed made on an iphone as an excuse for two people to get out of the house to, this one, which starts with a murder attributed to the âslasher dot comâ killer while an irritated cop explains vpns and the tor browser to the camera. its never explained whether or not slasher dot com is an actual website as opposed to just the name they gave this one dating site killer bc then the movie turns to two people, who met on a dating site, heading out to a cabin in the woods for their first date in order to be menaced by assorted rednecks and etc. honestly i enjoyed this one alot bc it has a lot of those great independent cinema touches which soulless studio exec guys would look at and go like âthis is stupidâ or âwhy are you doing thisâ. for example the owner of the campsite is a lady called mama whose main thing is that whenever she meats the main guy she pulls out a spoon full of food and jams it right into his mouth (slow mo smash cut of the mouth), explaining that the spoon has âbeen in her family for generationsâ. and then later when both the campers are tied to chairs she menaces them by stroking them with the spoon, menacingly licking the spoon scooping peopleâs nipples with the spoon⌠thereâs also a good bit where they have to sign a waiver to check in and she explains âiâm sorry - we only have crayonsâ.
this one has a few parts that might not have survived focus group testing but which iâm glad made it in, incl the eventual reveal that the lady keeps shoving her spoon into guys mouths bc its the one she jacks off with while taking a bath, another part where their daughter flirts with the main guy by suggestively rubbing her crotch with a dismembered doll head, and a very you-know-what-good-for-them moment of directorial florish where they make sure to linger on the evil milf (jewel shepard from return of the living dead!) stuffing her panties into the guys mouth while heâs wiggling helplessly in his underwear. but the true secret weapon of the movie is the reason i put this on my watch list after clicking at random thru the runtime: the amiable weed smoking bystander character wearing a Tri-Sexual shirt with a picture of a tricycle on it
twilight syndrome: dead go round: idk what relation this has to twilight syndrome the games but it IS videogame themed - everyone has an (unnamed, unlicensed) nintendo ds equivalent and they meet by gathering at a theme park for a videogame release event given by their favourite game designer, Evil Clown. i think you will be able to work out most of the plot revelations from there but i actually enjoyed this one for the extent to which it still commits to trying to wrongfoot you. like it keeps introducing new characters as protagonists only to kill them off quickly to focus on the gimmick side characters. one of the kids picks up a stick and beats the evil jigsawesque game designer clown to death with it like 20 minutes into the movie, and itâs this long music-less scene of the kid screaming and weeping, and everyone else looking horrified, and the dead clown motionless in a pool of blood on the pavement⌠and then an identical clown rolls up in a tiny clown car (which he keeps referring to as his âsupercarâ). by the end of the movie they are being chased by dozens of feral clowns and hitting them with cars, shooting them with crossbows etc. the giant ball from The Prisoner shows up except it keeps making overdubbed baby sounds and they obviously get it to chase people by having crew members bounce it at them from offscreen. imo thats what you want from one of these. the same director also apparently did a film version of Fatal Frame.
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Just two more movies to go until I have seen every one of Elvisâ 31 movies. It had been a long time since we saw one that could be considered decent (or, even good, as I am more quicker to situate these in context of Elvis pictures than my partner is) since we started out on the 14 or so musical romantic comedies he made in the span of just 3 years. But last nightâs double feature of two late, late Elvis pictures was pretty rewarding! I still donât want to say too much about these until afterwords, but the best one was probably as close to Elvis starring in The Master as you can get. I will share only this actually great musical number from the film. Look at that bizarre editing and camerawork!!
We only have two westerns left. One at the start of his career, Flaming Star, which Parker recommended. And one of his last, Charro, which seems remarkable if only because he has a scruffy chin throughout. Heâs worn some great sideburns but never has he had a beard⌠until now.
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Seriously, WHAT the hell is going on with the PD here, half the video feels like someone inserted joke-cuts for cheap laughs, and I absolutely love it, thanks for posting this!
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Quick skip into slasher.com, and by chance i have found the best horror shot of the movie
⌠no, i had enough, thanks.
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Watched a tbs superstation joint from 1997 called NIGHT VISION starring fred williamson, cynthia rothrock (who spends the entire movie acting like Kuroyanagi while people call her QUICK DRAW MCGRAW derisively), and robert forster in a bit part as a dude named TEAK TAYLORâŚtypical williamson vanity project sleaze where he plays the shittiest most drunk guy ever but heâs Really Cool despite dressing like your friendâs dad. Cynthia rothrockâs fits are mostly terrible but at one point she dresses like hana from flower sun and rain w murder gloves which is fantastic. Fred williamsonâs boss is a racist italian guy who has pictures of john wayne plastered on literally EVERY fucking wall of his office itâs completely unhinged
Theyâre hunting a guy who guts women in his enormous conspicuous black van full of analog recording equipment named THE VIDEO STALKER who is played by an incredibly shitty actor who I think is trying to channel tom noonan in manhunter but like can only do this by just sounding a little gay? Heâs abysmal. Thereâs also a scene that lingers wayyy too long on a headshot girl with her boobs out like actual porn that made me think the director and the video stalker might have a few things in common. Anyway, like half the townâs police force is implicated in this international snuff pornography ring possibly subsidized by the CIA and basically nobody gives that much of a shit so we can have scenes of Cynthia Rothrock and Bushwick Bill (!!!) smiling and not saying a single word while an entire room full of people clap for fred williamsonâs character. Also at one of these AA meetings cynthia rothrock and fred williamson wear matching celebratory black cowboy outfits with fringe because she said sheâd fuck him if he was sober for 60 days. Ladies, your pussy is worth a lot more than that.
A truly amazing film where nearly nothing happens. They made three sequels to this!
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yeah it looks like vic berger directed it
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