Grandpa Gamin' thread 👴

I got a little too wet ‘n’ wild postin’ up a storm in the Games You Played Today thread, so I’m gonna relegate my rapid fire posting here.

Oh also I drummed this up.

Anyway, I’m pretty bad at games, and even worse about finishing 'em. Usually I’ll die and just flat-out give up. Or a game will give me a D-rank or something and I’ll tap out. Or some are just too dang scary. Dark Souls has kinda gotten me to confront all of those things (no letter grades, but I know what I did to Havel was not honorable), and has motivated me to finally conquer “The Games I Will Never Beat,” so I’ll try and post about my progress with 'em here.

I was worried I’d be starting this from zero, but I actually beat a couple of games I never thought I would last year! Namely:

  • Resident Evil: Here it is, the granddaddy (grandpa?) of games on here. I got it when I was 12 or so back in 1998/99 and it scared the hell out of me. Always made it up to the point where Hunters come into play and quit. Not quite so scary 20+ years later. Great game!
  • Dragon Quest: Turns out you can beat this sucker in one good long afternoon! It was fun!
  • Super Metroid: Been haunted by this one for a while, but it turns out it’s not so bad. Also cleared through Fusion (previously got terribly stuck at that spider boss) and Dread (not so bad, that last boss took some doing). And the Dread-ful Samus Returns, and that bad final boss fight.

I put some stuff in that little graphic I wanna try to beat. If I start playing them, I’ll make sure to say if I got somewhere in them! And hopefully I do, or this thread will get Axed for good and I will no longer be allowed to game, or something.

Super Ghouls N Ghosts on there is probably a joke, though. My old man reflexes can’t keep up with that game and its cruelty, much less go through it twice in a row. Love that music though.

Anyway hopefully I am OK posting this here. And hopefully this thread isn’t too annoying! Apologies if it is :weary:


i’ll move your posts across to this thread, but i think this belongs in KOP if you’re bold enough

edit: wait @Grandpa do you want ALL your post sequences from that thread or just dark souls


Baby’s first attempt (well, since it came out on 360 ages ago) at Dark Souls.

Making mistakes but having a good time. Turns out losing a ton of souls (at this point, ton = 2000 or so) is mostly an unfortunate inconvenience, and not something to fret over.

Easily got one of those gargoyles down to half health, but then they had to twist the knife a little! What a game.

Seems to run OK on Switch. Voice quality is bad, but hell, I played through AC Valhalla and that game sounds like it was recorded with a tin can, I can handle some wonky compression.


this is the most important concept to internalize for dark souls (second being “there’s no such thing as too cheesy”) so you’ve got the right mindset! there are many places to farm for souls once you’ve opened up more of the game. part of what i like about it, actually; the endgame progression is basically monhun-style mob hunting and fishing for drops to perfect your loadout

if you have difficulty on the gargoyles, you can summon solaire to trivialize the fight, assuming you can make it to the fog door while human (easier said than done lol)


unwarranted but correct tips:

  • you can upgrade everything to at least +5 without any additional items through andre, and the returns on weapon damage are better than soul leveling. so on the early game focus your soul levels on endurance and vitality if you’re having trouble living.
  • endurance just generally is the best stat for making rolling and stamina management easier
  • if you have trouble dodging attacks but are still getting hit, unlock the camera. camera lock limits your rolling directions to four, and unlocking also keeps the camera more stationary, for a battle against only one or two enemies, you can just have both enemies on screen at all times by manually controlling the right stick, while also having full movement control with the left stick, and you have all of your moveset still available. locking on is a player trap
  • also you can just save the gargoyles for later if you want and fuck around in other areas for souls and items and the sheer joy of exploration. branching out from firelink, the game is sneakily open world

I used one of my little humanity shards and summoned Solaire, only to be immediately tailwhipped off the roof by the first gargoyle :frowning:

Honestly, even fighting the two gargoyles alone seems doable, it’s just dealing with that room with the shitload of Hollows right before it. Those assholes are a menace in numbers, and I wind up using half my flask stock taking them on.


I have also been playing Dark Souls Remastered. It’s been a very brisk great club pyromancer run. 2 for 4 lord souls down. I am mid-bed fight and dreading the tomb of the giants. Tomb might be my least favorite area in the whole series, based solely on the arbitrary darkness. Oh, my literal burning fingers produce no extra light. I need this specific bug from a specific location that produces a special magical light because the lantern that drops from a certain limited-spawn enemy did not drop.

I’m glad the sequel gives you a torch. Imagine making a dungeon crawler with impenetrable darkness and not giving the player a torch.


yeah this is one of the most memorable parts of the game for me because it’s the first time those assholes pose a threat. It’s great. I got really good at running past them and only taking one hit lol


Took a little doing, but I got it down. I beat those gargoyles.

Now I’m heading to the lower section of the city and…ah! I’m fucked once again!

Don’t think this dude would be so bad if it weren’t for all these dogs hopping around.


“Kill the dogs first”

Always solid DS advice.

There’s a cheese strat, if you want to know it you can ping me here or on Discord!

I’m not gonna litter this thread with everything that happens in Dark Souls, but I do love how everyone who isn’t, y’know, actively trying to kill you, is some sort of insane pervert.

The dude who magically appears in the clocktower after you ring the bell, this weirdo merchant I some how ran past dozens of times without seeing him.

They’re great. Just haunted fucking weirdos.


please do it soothes me


Dark Souls is putting me through the ringer. I don’t mind attempting to fight this asshole and his two dogs in his little grotto. Sure, I beef it half the time within seconds of entering the fog door. That’s OK.

It’s the five minute trek back each time that’s wearing me down. Even with the shortcut, that’s a good jaunt!

Main advice I see is “put up your shield when you walk in, you’ll be fine” and uhhh not really? 75% of my stamina and maybe a good 40% of my health down, and then those dogs get me.

Ah well! I didn’t think I could beat those gargoyles and I eventually got through that. Surely this asshole, his dogs, and his tiny hell hallway will be familiar soon enough.


i abandoned any notion of doing capra solo on my very first playthrough, summoned a person and that was swiftly that


think it is still dangerous to do any summoning Right Now.

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Impossible i believe, i don’t think they’re rolling it back out until elden ring comes out


please follow social distancing protocol when traversing lordran


i’ve been doing summoning and invading on ps4. should i not have?’

anyway it works fine for me

edit: turns out it’s just PC version. remastered for switch should still have online functionality. I’ll do co-op if u wanna @Grandpa :))


I’m gonna keep slammin’ my head against this goon until I get him. I’m determined!!

That said I could see myself breaking down and begging for help when I get to the infamous two big fellas I’ve heard so much about.

But thank ya, everyone!