Games You Played Today: 358 Threads Over 2

Came out today that PGI handed bans to several players who were on teams called “trans rights” and “trans fights” and said “trans rights” at the start of matches. Apparently “trans” is banned by the MWO EULA according to the President of PGI (it’s not) so now my buddy is actively tempting a ban and I love him for it. Fuck these guys. They use pride to sell garbage and then ban you for saying “trans”. Scumbags.

MechWarrior Online is run by greedy assholes who do everything they can to make their game look and play worse. As such, enjoy watching the lead designer get bullied in his own game by the silliest mechanic of the beta (knockdown; if you run into another mech hard enough it used to make them ragdoll lol)

Watching this video gives me so much nostalgia for beta MWO…

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Getting back into Sakuna: of Rice and Ruin, and forgot how good it is. Simulating the annual/seasonal process of harvesting rice feels really gruelling in a tight resource-y way and like most people I would never want to physically do this unless my life depended upon it. You get to learn a lot about rice farming but it’s not shoved down your throat in a ‘did you know’ kinda way, the game seems content to make things more experiential and pseudo-simulate the rest. The conceit is that the characters are all trapped on an island together as punishment from the gods and having to grow rice together is how you learn to not be a whole bunch of arseholes.

The bickering gets pretty grating after a while and it’s clearly meant to be bad but they really oversell it. People be slapping infants and just having a spat every other line of dialogue. Character development could make Sakuna a bit less of a priggish brat a lot earlier and everyone else a bit more willing to literally work to survive together. There’s a nice scene where the characters are arguing but one just starts singing a song they remember - the rationale being that because growing rice is so difficult, people who talked during the work would end up just complaining eventually. Singing prevents that which leads to a really basic but heartwarming cutscene

There’s a lot of PS2 energy and I think it’s:

  • Drastically compressed and abrasive english VO
  • Unintuitive user interface (fertiliser) which you crack through brute force experimentation
  • Novel set of 3D rice farming minigames which are somehow contextualised by really videogame-y elements like ‘hunting’ which is a bunch of 2D character action - my brain still reels that this feels both experimental and cohesive
  • Houses you can enter that have no purpose other than to store rice or be a menu for weapons or some late-game unlock
  • Somewhat challenging legibility because font is thematically tied to game’s setting
  • Cutscenes leaning into super static camera placement and movement

Melty Blood: Type Lumina is a game about punching vampires to acquire dopamine. My brain is all about the game and really wants to get into it but my hands say ‘please I am tired thanks’ after an hour. I really like what it is borrowing from UNI and, to some extent, Strive, keeping the basics simples and the deeper systems deep. I like Miyako a lot since playing Potemkin in Strive has given me a taste for a game plan that is one half ‘how the hell do I get in’, one half ‘BAM’. I badly need a wsad hitbox.


G-String is really good but between extremely finicky aiming and too much precision required of physics and platforming puzzles. I absolutely love the world, but I think I’m just going to watch the rest since a firefight takes about five times as long using this joystick, even with sensitivity calibrated. Levels just have such tight and miniscule geometry I am literally fighting to keep myself away from damage and falls. The game wanted me to stack boxes to get over a really iffy collision mesh at one point and I’m just exhausted. Getting over a videogame fence should not be physically more demanding than planting a videogame rice paddy.

I created the only custom controller config for Steam users since there wasn’t already one so I guess I’ve done my good deed for the day.


The Forgotten City is a comfy timeloop mystery and kinda reminds me of Paradise Killer/Danganronpa if they were targeting a classics scholar. The premise is that you are trapped in a commune physically sequestered from society but located in the latter half of the Roman period. All citizens are Romans (or have acquired Roman citizenship) but must abide by a supernatural rule that says that if anyone commits a crime all must die. When this does inevitably happen you get to timeloop and try to figure out what’s going on with new knowledge. I had an idea for a short story like this a long time ago whereby an unseen supernatural force silently destroys the worst actors of society starting with the wealthiest (corrupt billionaires would be killed in bizarre and impossible ways, tax havens would descend into the ocean etc. - looking back on it I think I was having a weird Neil Breen period).

Anyway, the problem with this kind of premise is that it always comes back to some kind of moralising and Forgotten City does a good job of muddying the waters by blending the high concept republicising with historical and political details, and doing its best to explore what would happen. In this way it’s probably one of the better science-fiction games I played in a long time. So far, the player doesn’t really do much but run around and have conversations with people but that’s fine by me. They might explain this a little further in, but when you first get there the commune say they’ve survived seven months. 23 people (mostly strangers to each other on first arriving) having never committed any major crime for seven months. At first I thought this was hard to believe but it’s actually more engrossing to turn over the absolute horror of living through this. Reminds me of the Twilight Zone episode with the omnipotent child except here the child is invisible and has a specific political agenda.

Since this is a remake of a mod from an Elder Scrolls game it’s interesting to see the details they changed. Who knew just fading to, and back in from black and having the NPC start by facing away from, and then turning towards, the player would make the Elder Scrolls NPC dialogue transition more bearable.

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beat Final Fantasy V today. after grinding everyone up to around level 42, i took on Neo Exdeath using a Samurai (2H), Mimic (summon, whm), Ninja (blm), and Dragoon (time) and didn’t really have any problems, this time around. i wish i could have found some more interesting combinations and weird mixes, but i ultimately opted to go for whatever let me do the most damage using jobs i liked.

30 hours is basically a perfect amount of time for this kind of game for me, so i was really pleased with that. that said, FFV kind of leaves me wanting more, and i suppose that’s where the bonus stuff of the GBA version would potentially satisfy. but also, it’s nice the game doesn’t over stay its welcome, and it really feels designed for multiple playthroughs. shame about no New Game+ on the SNES. but i’d definitely love to do a run of this game using nothing but weird jobs.

has there ever been a mainline FF game that is as laid back as V? the game doesn’t seem to rely on dramatic moments and melancholy characters quite as much as the rest of the series, but it definitely makes the whole thing feel like a fun Saturday-morning cartoon adventure. it almost feels as though the world of the game is a playground for you, the characters like action figures.

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i’d definitely recommend another playthrough experimenting with the jobs you didn’t touch last time and perhaps researching some stuff

the chemist job is def one of my favourite comically overpowered things in a jrpg

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Been plugging away at Zero Time Dilemma and… well there is a point where at a choice selection point you have to enter a name, with one branching option that wasn’t possible to figure out. I hit a point in the story where a new name came up and it struck me to try and enter it there. The game somehow accepted it and the maybe 30-45 second scene after scared me in terms of what it could possibly mean. Just in time for the likely home stretch too!

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i’ve also been playing ffv and enjoying it, but recently switched two of my characters over to blue mage and chemist for the first time and i feel like it’s kind of ruining it for me. there are just so many options to consider, and for blue mage the act of acquiring new skills is really rote and uninteresting. i guess if i had someone as blue mage from the start maybe it would have been more fun, but it feels to just sort of suck all the momentum out of the game. even if you have a beastmaster with ‘control,’ trying to coordinate all that stuff in the middle of the battle just makes the random encounters last way too long. then, once you have the blue skills, a lot of htem seem to fail half the time anyway, very frustrating…

i mean i feel like it is still very cool as a concept, it just changes the flow of the game so much for me that i think i’ll have to switch back to the less gimmicky jobs to finish it

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i tried to go back to animal crossing last night and couldn’t do it, i was at the point when i stopped where i was watching a bunch of videos of people making super instagram islands and wanted to at least try to do that myself but then we had a kid

and going back to it now makes me feel a little stressed because it would be too much work to finish the island and too much work to get it back to a state where i can just chill out and hang with my friends so i don’t know what to do :frowning:

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yeah this is why i skipped over blue mage this time. i initially made one of my characters into one immediately, but when it became clear i would have to specifically grind for the skills, i gave up on it.

chemist seems more viable, but i didn’t try it until the last dungeon.

some of the more gimmicky jobs, like geomancer, are weirdly versatile and usable, whereas others that are more straightforward, like ranger, are not very useful.

an interesting and mixed bag!

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project-gorgon1
project-gorgon2

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[insect-like chittering]

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I’d probably love Animal Crossing if they shoved some sort of optional RPG adventure in it so I had something to do and work towards beyond just what ultimately come down to virtual chores. As soon as the honeymoon phase is over, the realization of it being chores with no end in sight sets in.

I assume I should just play Fantasy Life or whatever.

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Fantasy Life is very little animal crossing but great if you want to do chores and kill monsters. I think it’s wonderful honestly but I have no idea why the marketing and reviews all mentioned animal crossing.

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It’s kind of like a JRPG Fable II

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Oh that’s why I like it

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Hey wait a second, Fable II wholesale lifts the DQV time skip

Nice job, Lionhead

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Probably missed the neat back-and-forth over Circle of the Moon by a hundred posts now but after doing roughly half of the castle I threw on Symphony as a palette cleanser and whoops there went my free time!

While the soundtrack gets a lot of love generally I’m actually more taken by the sound effects; specifically Alucard’s constant RRURPs and BLURRPs, the smash of shattering skellybones and that fat smacking sound when striking hunchback-riding geese

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So I finished up Zero Time Dilemma @Rudie and… that was kinda a mess wasn’t it?

With it all said and done the weird fragmented story didn’t really add much of anything and in fact may have covered up that the actual linear narrative seemed to be kinda patchy. There’s a point near the start of the last act where it comes together to and seeing how things link together is legit interesting enough and then… I literally have no idea what that twist actually added to the narrative while adding several questions which is of course the hallmark of a well executed one (or the opposite of).

The thing is the twist is such a “okay I guess?” moment that I don’t think it tanks the actual story; the ending run does that on its own. There were stakes set by the second game and stuff mentioned in this one and you basically don’t do anything to address the end of the world as you randomly end up in a different timeline, which would be fine as there’s an even bigger potential apocalypse that unfortunately isn’t addressed during the game itself. Even the explanation as to why all this had to happen felt very tossed together. One can argue that as a valid way to tell a story but it wasn’t particularly satisfying at the end there.

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I’ve been playing the new Mario Golf with my roommate, it’s pretty fun. We just play standard golf without special shots, it’s pretty solid. The courses are kind of bland.

We also tried Clubhouse Games and played a version of local chess where the board orientation doesn’t change for each player’s turn, so what was designed for tablet mode table play turns into a nightmare on my television (for playing black)

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Oh yeah, I started playing F-Zero X as 1) I got it for free for the Wii VC thanks to unused Nintendo points some time back, 2) I should probably play it before trying GX, and 3) while not much of a racing game fan I do have a soft spot for Wipeout racers. Falling off the course being instant death as opposed to being dropped back on the course with less time is the harshest racing game thing I can recall coming across in forever and I can’t even get past the third track on the third GP on easy before running out of lives. I know some people often complain about games being too tutorialized nowadays but it is still breathtaking to go back and see how beginner hostile some older games could be.

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A few hours in, Metroid Dread really irritates me. There’s so much that’s Technically Fine about it: the controls feel super smooth, the boss fights are way more involving than I expected, the progression is pleasantly surprising, has a good rhythm and mostly strikes a right balance between making you feel lost and gently nudging you in the right direction. Basically, a lot of it feels like a cool fangame, made by someone who really wants to please a certain subset of hardcore fans. But I’m not a hardcore Metroid fan, just someone who really liked Super and Fusion and would want another game that feels inspired or singular in one way or another, and Dread…

  • Really don’t care for the setup or presentation of the story. First, you get hit with a two minutes long PowerPoint presentation explaining plotlines of Metroid 2 and Fusion, then, 90 seconds of similarly static exposition introducing the new storyline (there’s a planet called ZDR, Parasite X was discovered there, seven robots were sent to investigate and disappeared mysteriously, Samus needs to check it out, that’s literally all, you don’t even learn what the planet is). Then, over 60 second of a cinematic where Samus Aran’s ship slowly approaches an alien planet while her monotone AI navigator keeps repeating that the mission is too risky. Then, it cuts into a confusing shot of Samus lying in some cave in a different armor where she gets flashbacks about landing her ship and getting her ass kicked by some big bird guy in a goofy metal armor, two and a half minutes. It’s meant to be a mysterious introduction, but it only comes off as insanely overlong and sloppy, like they really don’t have a handle on the possibilities offered by increased visual fidelity so they keep falling on the most boring cliches from the past games. It’s insane how efficient it was at killing my excitement while booting the game for the first time.

  • The UI/UX work is a major letdown. In the first 15 minutes, you’re constantly assaulted with overbearing tutorial prompts that actively work against the mood of feeling lost on an alien planet the game just spent 150 seconds trying to establish. There’s one time where the game suddenly fires up the map on its own and starts zooming in like your controller was malfunctioning (and it’s Switch, so it’s more than probable). The map itself is so visually cluttered and hard to process, it somehow gave me Doom 2016 flashbacks in 2D, pause menus in general seem like they were designed for a low rent 3DS game and blown up into high res, these huge inelegant chunky windows and fonts. It’s just vaguely unpleasant to do or look at anything that is not directly connected to navigating Samus through this world…

  • …and the world itself does not read as a believable world, just an amalgam of what worked in previous games without comparable visual flair. Some underground caves and passages, some abstract anonymous facilities, monsters whose looks I cannot remember beyond vague archetypes. The worst part is how EMMIs are supposed to be stars, these menacing Terminator-like enemies the game is built around, but scan as generic sleek mining machines with some admittedly decent animation work, and thanks to generous checkpointing moving through their zones is like bruteforcing your way to the nearest exit, Rain World but with 10% of possibilities for interesting things about to happen. Not to mention how uninteresting their lairs are to visually process or plan escape routes around – once again, increased fidelity isn’t matched by a new approach, this time to a sense of place.

  • Action-heavy cutscenes often feel like they’ve had Japanese-style storyboards that rely on heavily emphasized poses/keyframes but were animated by people who kept deciding to connect these in one unremarkable smooth motion, constantly leaving me with “this should have been cooler than that” feeling. The decision to make cinematics run in 30 FPS probably contributes to that.

  • ADAM’s voice is simply unpleasant to listen to and unlike Fusion, he keeps droning on and on about obvious stuff. The controls are shockingly complex, pretty much every button is used and you’re often expected to hold like three of them while using the control stick. Just like in Samus Returns, the focus on parrying makes your interactions with alien lifeforms too uniform. The music is neither atmospheric or emotional. Even some minor stuff like door transitions often feels weirdly sloppy in a way that feels like a deliberate sabotage of Nintendo polish/gamefeel. And so on, and so on.

It’s possible I wouldn’t mind most of this in a game that actually has some design ambitions and struggles to express them holistically, but Dread is all about polishing a proven formula. I assume a fan who is all about DEEP CHOZO LORE and finetuned familiar Metroid rhythms will be overjoyed, but all the game has done for me so far was killing some time and reminding me that the older I am, the less patience I have for these unimaginative franchise continuations that thoughtlessly fetishize the familiar abstractions to please the fans. Reach for the same core inspirations to express something new or repackage the same thing while using the craft of experts in cutting edge digital art, whatever. Just don’t sell me a game that comes off like a sloppy Unity remake of a thing I used to love, ESPECIALLY right after I’ve just been burned by that new Monkey Ball.

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