OK, somebody let Michael Bay do a Bomberman adaption next, what could possibly go
This is beyond my imagining. I have no clue what we are to behold when this is through and we can get our popped corn and view it at the cinemas… unfathomable. unfathomable.
His last video game project was DmC: Devil May Cry.
why is this necessary
I highly doubt this ever becomes a movie. I also don’t really think this game should be a movie, or really, any video game. I can understand why people would want film adaptations of books – books aren’t a visual medium, and getting to see what you’ve read transcribed to a visual medium can be interesting. But video games are not only a visual medium, but also an interactive medium and boiling them down to a 90 minute movie just feels like a step-back for anybody that actually gives a shit about these games. I just don’t see a fucking point, from a consumer standpoint, other than to make some money for studios and companies.
But ultimately, I don’t give a shit. I’m not going to see it in the off-chance it does actually come out, so it’s not going to bother me either way if this does happen and it turns out to be awful. They’re always awful.
The Bob Hoskins Mario is very good, we can’t forget
see lol i also thought of Super Mario Bros. (1993), which i love, and it’s always the first example of a “successful” video game film adaptation i think of but like, by “successful” i mean “a complete fucking mess where Bob and John and several other actors got injured on set and the two directors (fresh off of fuckin Max Headroom) were forced out of the production because they were such incompetent douchebags and it’s a completely bizarre AU that barely resembles anything Mario.” which are all key parts of why i, again, fucking love that movie, but it’s not repeatable and really shouldn’t be. quite probably isn’t, legally
a long long time ago the earth was ruled by dinosaurs. they were big, so not a lotta people went around hasslin’ 'em
videogame movies i like that arent cartoons cuz cartoons are better at being videogames than humans and have an unfair advantage
jcvd street fighter
mario movie (1993)
ace attorney
like a dragon
The Street Fighter movie is my other favorite videogames movie!! for similar reasons to the Mario one!! (including the awful and borderline abusive production lol)
and i really like that take haha i think having real people dress in the flamboyant outfits videogame characters wear is inherently amazing and heightened
it’s like the opposite of what we get in the new Mario Bros. and Sonic movies where we have competent animation mixed with competent voice direction to create something kinda anodyne
(like i really think i’d have preferred the Sonic movie with horrible 1st draft tooth-goblin Sonic, Ben Schwartz’s Sonic is actually very good? but could have been transcendent coming out of that monster)
and it also meant getting fucking all-timer villain performances out of Dennis Hopper and Raul Julia
The Sonic movies were pretty good, with 3 being the best and having some goofy callbacks to Sega lore. They even snuck in a reference to the “Shadow loves Latinas” meme.
every videogame movie should automatically be in the Last Starfighter genre and just be about a gamer who gets sucked into the game, i keep emailing studios this and they keep not responding
the live-action resident evils are enjoyable in part because they focus entirely on paul ws anderson’s fanfic original character, played by his longtime wife, milla jovovich, and a main focus of the series is depicting her as cool and badass and extremely beautiful, which is imo a hugely underrated skill in cinema. like there’s more to it than just casting photogenic actors… the resident evil game plots and lore and characters end up being mostly incidental, idk i think its one of the better trashy movie franchises of the past 20 years, she carries those movies with her performances. also the monster hunter movie where milla and tony jaa spend half of it developing a wordless friendship was good too. paul ws anderson should direct every videogame movie and make them all into a stories about his fanfic original characters played by his wife. garland doesnt have what it takes
Paul WS Anderson is the platonic wifeguy
like i can only dream of wifegirling (wifewifing?) as hard or really being wifegirled as hard…
script contains at least 30 minutes of manosphere angst about being maidenless