The Beautiful Game: Let's Learn More About Each Other Through Combat

enter the b*ner
-----Bruce Lee (1940-1973)

Remember that good time we all had a few months ago? Back when @slime and I hosted the Inaugural Dota (It’s Good, Actually) Classic? We took 10 SButts, many of whom had never touched a Fast Action Real Time Strategy game before, and we had them face off in one of the most complex, beautiful, and stupid games ever made. It was a mess! It was glorious. We had winners, and we had losers, and they all had a blast*, and to me that’s a wonderful thing. To me that’s the true spirit of game: competition.

Remember when Hiroshi Yamauchi said the reason the PlayStation outsold the N64 was cuz players were losers who preferred to be alone in their dark rooms playing depressing games? I wish I’d opened with that quote instead of Bruce Lee talking about his bone, cuz that Nintendo dude was right.

Remember when you could go down to the local arcade and put your quarter up on the machine and wait your turn so you could get your ass kicked by the best player in town in 20 seconds flat? No? Me neither, that’s a fucking dumb way to spend your allowance, arcades kinda sucked, I’m so glad it’s 2021 and I can just bop my friends in Fighters History Dynamite online for free.

Anyway where was I going with this

Oh yeah I’m sure we all remember so many things but I think thanks to recent events we’ve forgotten the most important thing of all: that games are best when played against others. That is the only way you can truly discover…

THE BEAUTIFUL GAME

I want to do a series of gamer streams featuring competitive games. Much like when we did the Dota invitational. I want to see my friends fight. If you are reading this you are my friend, feel free to put that on your résümé. I want you to post in this thread, and recommend games that can be played on gamer stream. I want you to volunteer for combat. I want you to volunteer to commentate alongside me as we watch some very sweet folks fumble at playing your favorite game. I want you to do my homework for me.

This is something me and @slime and @miffy have been discussing for awhile. Tonight I am finally pulling the trigger. I am hoping it leads to good things, even though this post isn’t quite as good as coherent a mission statement as I’d hoped. HERE ARE SOME GAMES WE HAVE CONSIDERED PLAYING:

  • Neo Turf Masters
  • Baseball Stars Professional
  • Quake
  • Tribes 2
  • Dota 2 again, but this time we let you know which pro players are the biggest racists
  • Ribbit King
  • One of those Bungie Real Time Mac Strategy games – Myths, I think they’re called?
  • Marathon Deathmatch: The Modes Where You Don’t Have To Read Any Terminals
  • That Game Gear Jeopardy Where It’s All Sports Questions
  • My OK Cupid Profile
  • Quake 3
  • Any Game That You Love That We Can Easily Spectate Without Spending Money

Thanks everyone thanks please chip in let’s make this topic a hit! Let’s all chip in and recommend fun games to play online. Thanks.

*If you ask some of the competitors how they felt about the experience they may lie to you and say “I hated it, and I hate Dota,” but they’re probably doing jokes. People love to do jokes. Jokes are some of the funniest things you can do.

**Thanks to Rudie for some help with the Japanese, but not all of it, don’t blame Rudie if some if it is bad. Also thanks to whomever made that MAME cab, it’s haunted my dreams for 15 years now.

27 Likes

You have literally never beaten me at this game

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Everyone who witnessed me beating @slime at the 2019 Neo Turf Masters Branson Invitational please blood potion this post.

I won at least $1 at scratch-off lotto thanks to that victory.

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i will play anything that will run on my old laptop

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I can’t believe you would do this to me on this, the day of my daughter’s wedding

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Slamming the table

VIDEOBALL

Remembering I live in Japan and lag

FUCK

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Videoball fucking owns

I got a copy of Quake 3 the other day which i’d really like to play with people

Its a shame Samurai Gunn doesn’t have netplay

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I’ll play samurai gunn over remote play

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Twinkle Star Sprites!

Also, some of you must have a copy of Day of Defeat Source which is my favourite ever FPS so let’s join together and listen in horror as our rival team discuss Hitler, ‘Broads’ and other associated topics in the year 2021.

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I’d be down to play anything even if I’ve never played it before, like Twinkle Star or Videoball. Is there a decent way to play N64 wrestling games online?

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B U S H I D O B L A D E

(hi Tulpa)

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Parsec is very good if the host has good internet

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I once fought against @miffy in Melty Blood and I thought, those were good matches. We could be good rivals. I feel bad that I haven’t jumped into the discord more often. I’d love to compete and tune in whatever the game may be. I can reach a zen state in Pikmin 3’s Bingo Battle, but otherwise, I’m a scrappy loser.

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Definitely down for Quake!

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I’m down for any FPS really. I’m bad at fighting games though

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i’m down for HALF LIFE 2 DEATHMATCH

:twisted::twisted::twisted:!!!

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Getting everybody onto Fortnight would still not make that game a good time right?

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Correct

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My refined Gamer’s Taste would not allow it, I say as I take a huge gulp of Diet Mountain Dew: Baja Blast at 10 AM

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