Cosmic Fantasy 2
I have no idea why I played this for so long. It is worse than the first Cosmic Fantasy. I am using the Un-Worked Designs patch and the beginning is still all sorts of messed up.
When I start out the game, I’m a young man in a small village. I meet my childhood crush at a big tree and we spot an explosion in the next town over. I check it out and almost every building has been reduced to ash. It’s striking to see a full JRPG town layout burned down. The shopkeepers stand next to their stalls and lament their lack of goods to sell. The innkeeper shrugs. Apparently a mean group was looking for the princess who has been hiding since birth. I go back to my hometown, and wouldn’t you know it, my childhood crush has been kidnapped. This is where the adventure, and the relentless encounter rate, begins.
As soon as I step out of the village, I encounter a lineup of four enemies. It’s only me and I don’t have a single exp to my name. I die very easily. The next matchup is similar. Then I start using my herbs. I win my first match by using three herbs in one battle. I instantly level up, go to town to buy more herbs, and the process repeats.
Eventually, I pick up another party member and the game flips completely to one that is embarrassingly easy. My second party member has a cure spell and she can use it over 10 times before needing to recover. Leveling up automatically replenishes health and magic, so I can wander around in a dungeon forever. I almost do. I keep playing and I have no way of rationalizing it. This game is so bland. Tenshi no Uta must be better.
Oh, but Tenshi no Uta was not localized by Working Designs, so I don’t get poetic excerpts like these:
Circus Lido
This is a puzzle platformer designed by and for aliens. I looked up Uni Post Company because I had never heard of them and this is their only game. The only staff with multiple credits to his name worked on only two other games: Cowboy Kid and a “humorous RPG with erotic content.”
In this game, I puppeteer a chameleon. The little guy can lick up bugs or climb vines with his tongue. My job is to lick up bugs and spit them out to feed venus fly traps. This task becomes very convoluted, very early. I’m pretty much stumped on stage 7, where the bugs will fall down a deep well that I cannot climb back out of. Trapped there, they have no hope of escaping and I have no hope of feeding them to my venus fly traps.
Exile
That’s right, it’s a two-Working-Designs-for-one special today. The concept and plot is very far afield from what video games typically tried to do. It takes place in an alternate version of the Crusades. There are Knights Templar and Seljuk Turks. The translation is very Working Designs. For example, the local lord’s name is Yuug D’Payne.
The game plays similar to Ys III, but jankier. Enemies and projectiles come on screen faster than I can react to them. There are a ton of “tonics” to buy in the shop and they all seem to heal me to varying degrees. There’s an attack gauge and an armor gauge that bounce up like a heart beat, meaning my stats vary slightly every moment. Because I go back to full health when I level up, I often deal with low health by walking back and forth and spawning easy enemies. I’m hoping magic will open things up more.
I walk around the town with a party of four people, each with their own background that I know nothing about. One of the characters only talks by groaning. I had hoped that these characters would help me out at some point, but they always wait outside of the action. I guess they’re only there to provide “flavor.” I start the game equipped with a shield and sword, but they also give me enough money to buy the next best shield and sword. The first thing I do is buy all the armor in the shop and sell my starting armor. I don’t know why they didn’t just start me with decent equipment and raised the prices in the shop. I don’t know their reasons for a lot of things with this game.