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I guess you can kinda argue that the Rambo thatâs just called Rambo is OK. Itâs pretty nasty and violent and mindless, but for being all those thingsâŚitâs fine, I guess?
John Rambo, though. Jesus. Wildly shitty to Mexicans, and the whole Home Alone sequence at the end doesnât come close to making up for how gross and racist it is.
And then at the end of it, Rambo, sitting on his porch all bloodied and waiting to die, suddenly lurches onto a horse and rides off into the horizon, because we gotta leave that door open to see an 80 year old who is more HGH than man shoot arrows into offensive stereotypes.
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Iâve never seen any of the sequels to First Blood and honestly I donât think Iâll ever willingly do so.
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Last night in Soho was surprisingly entertaining, and finding out how some of the scenes were made is mind blowing. That ballroom dancing scene must have been hell to shoot, and incredible to finally pull it off.
lazy weekends, dinner on the couch and a movie 2 nights in a row, Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse & Sing 2. hadnât watched Spider-Man in ages and itâs still really great but Sing 2 doesnât have any fat jokes so is better
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think alain delon is going to confess to murder before he offs himself?
Finally watched The Treasure of the Sierra Madre which was a nice reminder that movies can be fun and fun to watch, after what Iâd seen up to that point.
Immediately before that I finally got around to watching Anna to the Infinite Power, and part of me knew that there was no way a TV movie from the 70s was going to be worth the 20 years it took between hearing about this movie and finally watching it. Doing The Boys from Brazil but with a clone as the principal character isnât a bad idea, for a novel. But in a movie you have to cast an actual child in the role and, well, thereâs only so much you can do with that handicap. The filmmakers arenât blameless here either, as, like most bad sci-fi, they chose to introduce and resolve 80% of the storyâs dramatic tension in the final 2 minutes of run time, as two characters sit down at a desk and calmly talk to each other.
Before that I had a fit of madness and watched Transformers 1-4, 2-4 for the first time.
Transformers 1: I no longer think this is a terrible movie, it is just a bad movie. Iâve made peace that Michael Bayâs style is to let every actor go into scenes at 100%, like every shot was going to be part of their demo reel. It makes for very bad films, but occasionally entertaining decisions in the moment.
Transformers 2: For the first half of the movie this actually starts to course correct into a real dang story, with Shea Leboufâs character faced with potentially turning into his disgraced ancestor he had no respect for, and Megan Foxâs character discovering that her skills and talents give her the autonomy to choose her own path in life. And then half-way through an old robot turns on a teleporter, brings everyone to a different movie, and they spend the next hour and twenty hours running.
Transformers 3: ironically, despite dropping Megan Fox from the film, the replacement character for her is still following the same character development from the last movie. And then half-way through an old robot turns on a teleporter and takes everyone into a different movie.
Transformers 4: Of all the actors they could have picked to headline one of the most expensive movies in history, I can not even begin understand the decision to pick Mark Wahlberg. Bay lets every actor off the lease and Markie Mark is a dog with no run in him. Every other actor is lapping him in every shot.
This movie is roughly 70 hours long, with an extra 25 hours tacked onto the end because they cast Li Bingbing, so they were contractually required to visit Hong Kong. And yet none of that even rises to the top of my list of complaints, because somehow, in a movie that made a billion dollars, one of the main characters is a man who not only knows the age of consent in all 50 states, but has a laminated card. There is a scene in this 3 week long movie that exists just to show this card, so we know itâs cool that heâs dating Wahlbergâs 17 year old daughter.
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this made me snort laugh
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Wait till you see 5.
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When I started this endeavor that was my plan, but TF4 broke me so hard I donât think I can watch another knowingly bad $300m noise movie. It was a trial to get through that movie, and, even worse, Starscreamâs already dead, so the movie has nothing to offer me.
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But⌠Merlin. And also the Earth kinda falling apart.
And just so much.
But yeah, it isnât good.
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Hope to watch Cow this weekend. The director of American Honeyâs follow up film, a documentary about⌠a cow?
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What booji said, plus:
Itâs the last one. They wonât make 'em like this anymore, which is, technically seen, probably a blessing for mankind?
However. Who can fill that void of cheesy trashy roboto action that manages to go as wild and as many places as Monsieur Bay did?
Pacific Rim 2 did prove it needs some talent for making robot trash movies work, because it fell flat where Bayhem kept the TFes afloat ⌠the secret to watching them is taking a break somewhere around the first 1.5hs and come back a few hours later or the next day. But anyway, sane people would walk away so ymmv and donât trust me, i guess.
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My probably unpopular opinion is that Rambo 4 is the best one. I liked the book First Blood better than any of the movies, though.
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I watched drive (1997) with mark dacascos and kadeem hardison and wow rush hour really ripped this movie off and made it suck! itâs like what if you got rid of ALL of the race based humor Jackie Chan and Chris tucker have to go through and were just allowed to hang out and kick people? THEY EVEN DO THE EXACT SAME HEAD DANCE IN THE CAR. alll the stuntmen fucking took hits HARD AS HELL IN IT TOO. oh and Brittany Murphy is SCREAMING CONSTANTLY AND HORNY AS HELL. fuckin great movie. by far the best movie named drive
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âeverything everywhere all at onceâ is the natural next step in marvel-style movie making. was not surprised to see the russo brothers as the 3rd and 4th names in the credits. action movie thats really a high concept sitcom, constant pandering (targeted toward millennial and genx a24 audiences), desperate to be taken seriously in its interminable final act even though it has nothing serious to say beyond âlove is goodâ.
my main issue is this is ultimately just commercialized surrealism. the surrealism it sells itself on in the first hour is already somewhat cheap and sitcomy, but then it utterly undermines that surrealism in the second half by overexplainign and resolving every random plot thread and gag. this isnât a weird, out-there movie, its the same 3-act, âsave the catâ screenwriter structure you see everywhere just dressed up a bit.
credit where credit is due: michelle yeoh carries the movie hard, sheâs fantastic. likewise data from the goonies. the opening hour before it goes all pastiche is pretty good and it does have some cute comedy bits that i laughed at
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very interesting, Iâm so pumped to see this but itâs so easy to see how it could fall like that
Blowout (De Palma, 1981) is sold as a take on Blow-Up or The Conversation until you start watching and the very first frames are a parody of stalker movies and it pulls back to show that, no, these are just movies and theyâre just for fun, theyâre just a job. But even thenâŚBlowout is about people working in bad jobs but obsessed with their work, people who keep letting their work infect their whole life, in search of the perfect audio clip, the perfect shot, the perfect serial killer coverup storyâŚ
At a certain point it canât sustain the paranoid political thriller tone and vibrates into pure riotous camp and itâs just hilarious, John Travolta starts sweating buckets and every establishing shot is Ben Franklin overlooking another Liberty Bell Strangling and then it climaxes in a giant American flag and fireworks and great, globby, heroic tears over a slasher victim:
âthe perfect screamâ
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hey I watched this movie for the first time recently too, and it feels like the purest display of De Palmaâs films about making films
The most pornographic sequence in the film is Travolta syncing up the audio he recorded with the film the paparazzo recorded to reveal the story lurking in those disparate parts
If it was 2 hours of just that sequence, it would be one of the best movies ever made.
Also love how the serial killerâs garrote wire is heard in his initial recording and he never recognizes that sound, but the audience does. Economical in the way it did not explain to the audience that thatâs what he was hearing
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i also watched that movie for the first time and all the ediitng room equipment porno was great
john travoltas reaction to everything was too funny though, especially at the end. i have a hard time looking at that little man and not giggling
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im going to make you all watch the howard stern employee pep talk and angel dust for my birthday so dont watch those if you havent yet. weâre all gonna turn our brains to mush together. special showing of BEES if anyone has the constitution
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